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Tuesday May 26 2015 DAY 79 MOVIE OVERLOAD!
Dear Family and Friends:
Today I write a letter to everyone. First, I want to thank those of you who have been following my blog and for all the notes and messages received. Thanks for your encouragement. I haven’t been able to return messages for each one but I love receiving them. I am getting caught up now that I am finished with the class last week. That was such an amazing week.
The entire week last week was dedicated to learning about healing in the Biblical since. We had opportunity to be prayed for and to pray for others. I shared in a blog last week some of the truths I learned from scripture. I am not going to repeat it here because I want to listen to the download I bought last week of the sessions and do some deeper study before I share it and possibly share it incorrectly. I was so busy every moment of the day that by the time I came home in the evening to my Cousin’s home I could barely write my blog. I actually fell asleep a few times doing it and almost fell off my chair. Not a good feeling!
I want to share from my heart what this trip has meant to me. I have not clue as to what I am going to say so let me dig a little and stir up some memories. First I want to say thanks again to my husband for standing behind me in this endeavor, holding the fort at home (actually washing each toilet at least once a week) while I am gone, and giving me loving and encouraging words each day on the phone. I realize what I miss so much is his touch. That has never been one of my love languages but I realize now how much I miss it when it is not experienced everyday. Just a hug, a squeeze on the shoulder, the touch of a hand, all say so much. Touch those close to you. Give a hug to your spouse and children and GRANDCHILDREN. They may not think they need it but they probably really do. I love to give hugs and one day while at church I hugged a woman that I felt God was directing me to give a hug to each week. After several months I realized she always came up to me anticipating that hug. One Sunday she whispered in my ear, “I love your hugs. This is the only hug I receive all week and the only touch from another person.” She was widowed the previous year and lived alone. You never know how much a hug might mean to someone else.
One important thing I have practiced more, is listening. I always have so much to say that listening has sometimes been put on the back shelf. I want to say to any that I may have every offended in the past that I am truly sorry. I now realize that everyone has lots to say if they just have someone interested enough to listen. It is becoming more apparent to me that people need to be heard. People are starving to be heard. Do I have to agree with them? No. Do I need to tell them I disagree with them? No. All I need to do is listen. I am getting better at it and very educated at the same time (quite interesting educations). Do I still talk too much? PROBABLY! No… the answer is yes, but I have come along ways.
Another thing I have learned by listening to people and observing their relationships with one another is, that I need to step back and listen to my own voice as well. How do I sound when answering another person? What are my voice inflections saying to the other person? Are some of the things I speak even necessary? Do I sound defensive? If I disagree with something said do I need to argue until the other person agrees with my perspective? I ask myself these questions and wonder if some of the situations I see could be diffused if answered or spoken in a different tone of voice. I can remember times when it was pointed out to me that I came across differently than I thought I was coming across. It is up to us to be certain we say what we say in a voice and tone that depicts what we purpose to get across. I’ll have to practice when I get home to see if I am learning what I’m telling you about. I want to stop and listen to the words in my head before they become sounds in another’s ears. Words are so powerful. How they are spoken, what words are used, and how they are presented. Maybe we should STOP, LOOK, AND LISTEN…and then speak. I ask God that He will help me do that.
Even though my every day on the road has been full, rewarding, and wonderful in its own way I realize more and more each day how important are the friends that await me at home. Friends are precious and priceless. I think of individual friends and wish I could just call or connect with them. While at the homes of those I am visiting I believe it is important for me to give them my attention without a phone in hand or at ear. So I have chosen to leave the phone in my room and check messages occasionally to see if I have any pressing information that needs addressing. I have tried to return all calls within a few days. Honestly, I very rarely have a few moments to myself. I have been able to connect with my family on occasion by calling before I get out of bed in the mornings. Even when I awaken early or as late at 7:00 I can still call Wisconsin and find everyone up and at their day. Nights are a little more difficult because it is so late in Wisconsin before my day ends here. So I say to you in this letter a great big H E L L O! I do miss all of you and look forward to seeing you again but I don’t want to rush it. Even though I am in my 11th week of being on the road I am looking forward to every day that lies ahead, enjoying each one to the fullest when it comes.
This journey has given me an even greater appreciation for living in the moment. It is truly in the moment that I live. However, this week I have had a few planning sessions that have come up and must be attended to. Until I get the next segment planned I will have no place to go. This week is a gift from God to me. I have a home that has offered me shelter until I am ready to leave. Shelter AND delicious food! Hmm…maybe I should just stay the summer…they have great air conditioning too! But, I guess not. God still has assignments for me so I must get on the road again. I never know what my assignments are, when they will come, or what they are. When it is time, then I know. So I guess I’ll keep on keeping on.
Today I spent 4 hours at Triple A in Redding, California with a travel agent planning my next segment after I leave Daneece and Joyce. After hours of work, the travel agent’s computer would not accept all that she had input and she had to do it all over. I left and will pick up the plans tomorrow. My best recollection tells me that I will be staying at another 13 or 14 locations, some up to one week long, others as short as one nighters. I have four more homes to stay in and the rest will be Airbnb.com while I am on the road. If I remember correctly I think I wrote about Airbnb early in my blogging. For those of you who joined the blog later I’ll explain a little here. Airbnb stands for “online (through the air) bed and bath” accommodations in private homes. People are vetted (background checked) and join a network to advertise their home for rent. Usually it is just a bedroom and bath. And sometimes the bath is shared with the family. I stayed at two in Texas and had a feeling of safety as a lone woman coming into a neighborhood instead of going to a hotel parking lot and having to carry my belongings in by myself. As an Airbnb customer each traveler must also be vetted with a background check. One complaint about the home or the customer and the persons are not longer allowed to be in the system. So…everyone is on their best behavior. The prices go from $10 to hundreds of dollars per night. They are not in every town but I have been able to choose enough that I think I will be able to make it all across Canada by using only Airbnb. I do have a few places I will be with friends and family but other than that I will use Airbnb. I’ll tell you more about them as I journey toward home.
Speaking of “toward home” I have felt since the first day I left that my journey was always headed toward home, not away from home. I have always been progressing, not going away from, but going toward. And I am still progressing toward…and home is my ultimate destination. Home and a husband retiring on July 4th, and friends, and a cluttered house, two weddings to finish, one newborn session to finish and one senior portrait session to finish. Going toward my church body, and what is left of summer, and my husband, my son, my daughter-in-law and my two loves of my life, Zach and Xander, and my gardens, and my CSA box, and making more soups, filling my freezer, cleaning out 42 years of collections, redoing the kitchen, having surgery AND…QUIET!!! Oh yes, and retirement! As my friend Bill says: “NOT RETIRE–BUT REFIRE!”
Yes, I said QUIET! Pure unadulterated, soundless quiet. Just me and the Lord. NO TELEVISION!!! Hours and hours of quiet. And then I will go outside, sit in my chair and listen to the birds. I can hear the birds now you know. Before my ears were healed in October 2012 I had not heard birds for many years. The first time I heard the bird song I stood under the trees and cried. And I have been hearing them all across the country. Some of their sounds I have never heard before. Somehow, bird songs are not noise. To me they are like jewels tinkling in the air. And sometimes, I still stand under the trees and cry.
Love to all of you,
Kathleen
(Wanda to some)
May 11 2015 DAY 65 CALIFORNIA CAPITOL
Short blog today. I PROMISE! Trying to get to bed on time. Slept in today until almost 8:00 a.m. WOW! It felt so good. Rebecca and I had our own adventure today. I learned that I am not the only one that can get lost. However, I won’t say any more on that subject.
We took off for the Old Sacramento and actually found it. It was a very authentic looking old town of the mid 1800’s. It looks authentic because the building of old are all still standing, boardwalks and all. I took photos, but again forgot to do them on my IPHONE. You’ll just have to take my word for how charming it was. After I spent too much we headed to the Capitol building a short ways away. By the time we found it it was quite a ways away, only in miles driven, not in actual distance. It is a beautiful building. I remembered it being quite different than it actually is. I remembered it being larger but when I walked inside I realized the rotunda was much smaller and less height than the one in Madison Wisconsin. Truly it is beautiful but I must be a true Wisconsinite now because I thought Wisconsin’s capitol more beautiful by far. I’ve included a few pics below.
After the capitol tour we drove to Placerville about 45 min to 1 hour away. Had lunch, went to Rebecca’s son’s home so I could see him, (Adam) and then meet up with his other son’s (Ben) family and went house searching with a realtor. Ben and Sarah are shopping for their first house. It was fun to see the properties in the area. Placerville is known for being the county seat at the time of the gold rush. I am inserting one interesting story about the history of Placerville below. This is what it is most know for:
Excerpt from internet:
“Placerville was also known as “Hangtown” in its’ early days. Although many stories exist on how this name was acquired, the most famous story involved a colorful event that occurred in January of 1849. A gambler named Lopez gained a lot of attention for his big winnings at a local saloon. After he retired for the evening, several men tried to overpower him. Lopez fought back, and with the help of others, the robbers were captured. During their “flogging”, three of the robbers were also accused of being wanted for a murder and robbery.
With no more evidence than that, a short 30 minute trial took place and a unanimous “guilty” verdict was given. The crowd demanded that the men be sentenced to “death by hanging” and the rest was history. The famous hanging tree once stood in Elstner’s Hay Yard, next to the Jackass Inn. Today, the original stump from the old tree remains in the cellar of “The Hangman’s Tree” tavern on Historic Main Street.”
When I lived in California before moving to Wisconsin 30 years ago we often visited Placerville as we had some friends who lived there. Then it was a beautiful, quiet little tourist town at the halfway point between Sacramento and Lake Tahoe with a highway going through the rugged quiet hills. Now it is overcrowded, over built with wide freeways and lots of noise. Now the property values are even higher than those of Sacramento. Actually, between Sacramento and Placerville the scenery was wide open spaces of country. That all gone now. There are still some beautiful fields of natural grasses but they are few and far between. We didn’t go as far as Lake Tahoe. We are thinking we might go there tomorrow.
The house hunting ended and we took off for “home”. It so feels like home when I get back to wherever I am staying. I ate about half of the half that was left from lunch and now trying to get my blog finished before 9:00 p.m. So no reminiscing or long inner dialogue. I did meet two lovely ladies who worked in a oil and vinegar shop in old town. They touched my heart. Thank you ladies (if you read this) for sharing with me and allowing me to pray with you. I hope I hear from you.
Good night. It is 8:58 p.m. (But I’m not in bed yet)
Friday July 17 2015 A DAY OF THANKS!
Why is July 1th a day of thanks? I’ll tell you why. Thirty six years ago today I gave birth to my son. He was born two months early and things weren’t going so well. He was transferred to another hospital to the NICU center. His entire first year did not go too well. But since we are celebrating his 36th birthday you can conclude that he did survive.
Tonight when I hugged him I was so thankful that I have shared 37 celebrations of his life. That he survived the first 24 hours was a great celebration! We did not know if we would ever share another birthday with him.
As I hugged him I thought about the parents who this week lost an eleven year old son due to being run over by a car while he was riding his bicycle. They only had 12 celebrations of his life. I am so thankful for every day that my son has lived.
Courtland and his family came over for a birthday celebration dinner. It is always a joy to have my family over so I can make food they like and share in the enjoyment of once again having my son at our dinner table. On birthdays we like to tell stories about the birthday person. It is a fun time and I always learn something new as I listen to the stories. It is delightful to hear the stories that the three and seven year old tell. The three year takes a story that someone else has told and enhances it quite a bit. I think he even believes that what he says is true. Tonight the seven year old told the story about his dad coming over and having dinner with us. It was a very current story.
After the story time I asked each one to give Courtland wisdom they would like to share with him. Dave went first and actually gave him the same wisdom I was going to share. He told Courtland to never get too busy with all the things and hustle and bustle of life that he did not take time out to enjoy the everyday and ordinary things with his family. He encouraged him to live in the moment.
So I had to come up with something new. My wisdom to Courtland was to not neglect his spiritual life. To be certain he trained his boys in the way of the Lord and had them in church so it would become a way of life to them. I told him to walk in the way of integrity so that his sons would see his life walked out as a Christian Father. I recommended that he walk the walk.
This morning on the way to the gym I stopped at a garage sale in my neighborhood. It is a family I only know through our neighbor get-to-gathers. The daughter just graduated and is going off to college. I asked her what wisdom she had for others at this stage in her life. Ashley’s wisdom was: “Don’t sweat the small stuff”. That may be a short sentence and one that we have heard many times over in our lifetimes but until you learn how to “not sweat the small stuff” you don’t really understand how difficult it is to learn. If more people could just learn that earlier I think the world would be a much friendlier place. Thank you Ashley for your timely wisdom. I pray that as you grow into full blown adulthood that you will remember these words of wisdom today and take them to heart. You are already one step ahead of so many others in know this lesson of life.
DON’T SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF
By Kathleen Martens
July 17, 2015
Sometimes it’s the little things
That turn into all the big.
Little misunderstandings
Cause us to dance a jig.
Maybe we should listen more
And really hear what is said,
And just sleep on what makes you mad
Instead of worry, just go to bed.
Think on what bothers you,
Mull it over in your mind.
In the morning speak your piece
With words that are kind.
Understand the other’s view
And listen as they explain
There are always two opinions
Do not hear their words in vain.
Give just thought to their beliefs
It will be different that’s for sure,
And when you do understand
You may surely have the cure.
You will no longer suffer
From angry and malicious thoughts,
Because the small stuff is unimportant
In its struggle you’re no longer caught.
So…don’t sweat the small stuff
Place your focus on what is true.
Put your eyes on God alone,
And understanding will be shown.
Then the small stuff stays
Exactly where it should be.
Your spirit is no longer bound
By only what YOU see!
Well, I didn’t know that Ashley’s wisdom would by my inspiration for today’s poem. And timely I think it was. For you see, when I tried to publish this bog I did something incorrectly and lost everything except the poem. I had to totally rewrite everything (except the poem). It was as if I heard in my mind “Don’t sweat the small stuff”! And in the scheme of life, losing a blog really is small stuff.
It is late, Dave is asleep, so I will publish and go to bed. Dave is slowly making strides toward healing. I think he may have overtaxed himself today helping me do some things to prepare for tonight’s birthday celebration. His leg is still painful and red. His next appointment is Tuesday. He is still on oral drugs until then. Please pray that continued healing will be noticed daily.
My first blog was quite a bit longer and more detailed. Sorry for the “quick” version.
Good night and God bless you!
Visions of Poetry 