Saturday June 18 2016  GOD OF THE SCRIPTURES

Dear Readers:

Remember this is the first day of my break from writing the blog due to my current hectic schedule.  Below you will find the longest poem I have ever written.  It was written from verses that I wrote over a five month period while reading the book “Jesus Calling” by Sarah Young.  I went through each verse and picked out the description of who God says He is in the scriptures.  It is my favorite poem, especially on Father’s Day weekend.  God is my Heavenly Father and it does me well to remember all He is and all He does.  And just so you know this is not a complete list.  I still have seven more months of scriptures to write about.  I hope you enjoy this poem.  It is especially powerful when read aloud.  I promise, I will never post a poem this long again.  Note that though many scriptures are quoted I chose to print the poem in blue instead of red ink which I usually use for scripture verses.

 

GOD OF THE SCRIPTURES

Kathleen Martens

May 11, 2010

 

How great and vast is Your domain.

How can I comprehend Your love?
You are my refuge, a strong tower against the foe.

The earth is full of Your glory.

You give me strength and help.

You hold me by my righteous right hand.

You love me with an everlasting love.

You clothe me with the garment of salvation

Arrayed in a robe of righteousness.

You never leave me or forsake me.

You guide me with your counsel.

You are transforming me into your likeness.

You are my salvation.

I rejoice in this day you have made.

 

NO THING CAN SEPARATE ME FROM THE LOVE OF GOD.

 

NEITHER LIFE NOR DEATH.

NEITHER ANGELS NOR DEMONS.

NEITHER THE PRESENT NOR THE FUTURE.

NOR ANY POWERS.

NEITHER HEIGHT NOR DEPTH.

NOR ANYTHING ELSE IN ALL CREATION.

*****

Lord I am the work of your hand.

You are the potter.

I am the clay.

In repentance and rest You give me salvation.

In quietness and trust I gain Your strength.

Your power can accomplish more than I can ask.

You make my paths straight when I acknowledge You.

You meet my needs

According to  Your glorious riches in Christ Jesus.

I take refuge in You, and You bless me for it.

You are the God who sees me.

In this world I have trouble,

But You, Oh God, have overcome the world.

Your arms are everlasting.

You drive out my enemy before me.

You have transformed me by the renewing of my mind.

I rejoice in You Oh God.

You keep me in perfect peace.

You have placed the hope of the world in my heart

Which is in Christ Jesus.

How awesome is that!

*****

You have taught me to be still in Your presence.

You have made known to me the path of life.

You fill me with joy in Your presence

With eternal pleasure at your right hand.

Lord you are my portion.

Lord I hope in you, and You are good to me.

My hope is in You

And as I hope in You

You renew my strength.

I shall soar on wings like eagles.

I shall run and not grow weary.

I will walk and not faint.

I will wait before You Oh Sovereign God.

I give You my thanks

And worship You God

With reverence and awe,

For You God, are a consuming fire.

How precious is Your unfailing love.

I find refuge in the shadow of Your wings.

I feast from Your abundance.

I drink from Your river of delights

For with You is the fountain of life.

In Your light I see Light.

I rejoice in You again and again.

I sing for joy to You Lord.

I come before You with thanksgiving.

I trust in You for I know Your name.

You make me glad with the joy of Your presence.

Lord you are spirit.

And Lord You are freedom,

For where the spirit of the Lord is

There is freedom.

You have set me free from the law of sin and death.

 

Part 2

Oh Lord Almighty

Blessed is the man who trusts in You.

You have searched me Lord.

You know when I sit and when I rise.

You perceive my thoughts.

You discern my thoughts and my lying down.

You are familiar with all my ways.

You never leave me or forsake me.

You make me stand firm in You Oh God.

You have anointed me.

Lord you have set your ownership on me

And you have put your spirit in my heart.

You are mighty to save.

You are with me.

You take great delight in me.

You quiet me with Your love.

You rejoice over me with singing.

You give me ever increasing glory

Which comes from the Lord Who is the Spirit.

You dwell in my heart through faith.

You have rooted and established me in love.

You give me power together with all the saints.

You love me with a love that surpasses knowledge.

You desire to fill me with the measure of all the fullness of God.

You desire me to grasp

HOW WIDE

AND LONG

AND HIGH

AND DEEP

Is the love of Christ.

You offer me hope

That I may be greatly encouraged.

Your love is made complete in me.

You have given me FRUIT OF THE SPIRIT.

You have given me LOVE.

You have given me JOY.

You have given me PEACE

You have given me PATIENCE.

You have given me KINDNESS.

You have given me GOODNESS.

You have given me FAITHFULNESS

And SELF CONTROL.

I look to you Lord in Your strength.

I seek Your face always.

I seek first Your kingdom and Your righteousness

Because You are my help.

I will sing in the shadow of Your wings.

I will stay close to You.

Your right hand upholds me.

You help me develop perseverance

THROUGH TRIALS.

You intercede for me at the right hand of the Father.

I delight in You Lord

And You give me the desires of my heart.

I trust in You Lord and You give me soft pasture.

You love me.

You call me.

You grant me Wisdom

And put discernment upon my lips.

My heart cries out to You

And You give me understanding….

According to Your Word.

*****

You go out ahead of me Oh Lord

And I follow you as a sheep

For I know Your voice.

You are Father of all

And I give thanks in all circumstances

For this is your will.

You are the resurrection.

You are the life.

I believe in You Lord

And I have life.

You are gentle and humble in heart.

I find rest for my weary soul

In Your love.

I believe in You and am filled

With an inexpressible and glorious joy

Even though I cannot see you…

My faith brings the salvation of my soul.

With prayer, petition and thanksgiving

I make my request to You,

And Your peace oh God

Which transcends all understanding

Guards my heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

Your presence goes with me and You give me rest.

OH HOW I LOVE YOU GOD!

 

GOOD NIGHT AND MAY THE GOD OF THE SCRIPTURES BLESS YOU ABUNDANTLY!

Friday June 17 2016  THE SCOUTING MISSION

It was a dirty job, but someone had to do it.  Up bright and early to greet a quiet, still world.   I love waking up early.  When I awaken early it seems as if I am given a gift of more time in my day.  After food prep work relating to yesterday’s farm box, and making our lunch salad so it would be ready later in the day when we needed to eat, I left on a mission. 

If you have read even one or two of my blogs in the past month I am certain that you must be aware of the garage sale we plan to have next Thursday, Friday, and Saturday.   I have spent over a solid of month pilfering our house of everything that is taking up space without reason or cause.  I have just made a dent in all that I could gather, if I but had more time.  There are still cubby holes, closets, drawers, boxes, shelves, and pantry that still seem to cry out, “Don’t forget me!”.  So I must revamp every day from now through next Wednesday to allow me more time to do so. 

My mission this morning was to go to a local neighborhood and scour their annual garage sales.  My purpose was to garner ideas of ways to set up and display our “merchandise”.  It was not time wasted.  I observed many creative display techniques.  I even snapped a few pictures so I could share them with Dave.  One lady gave me two stand alone signs, one for an open house and one with another message emblazoned on each side.  Now I must cover them with poster board and paint my “Garage Sale” and arrow sign, and then stick them into the ground.  I hope I can find some more like that.  And of course while perusing the innovative table designs I just happened upon a few treasures for myself.  Like I said, it was a dirty job, but someone had to do it.

After looking over my calendar I realize that I cannot possibly accomplish what must be accomplished by next week if I continue publishing my daily blog.  Some of my readers have made it known that my blogs are quite long, so perhaps there will be some who are happy to know that I plan to publish my daily poem without a lengthy blog.  Some of the poetry will be the ones I compose each day.  Other poems I plan to include will be what I have written in the past.  I plan to return to the keyboard on July 4^th (in order to give you something to look forward to on your holiday)!

Actually, this week will be not stop sale prep, the following week will be getting my house back in order and packing up the leftovers for charity, and any extra hours will be used for mental and physical recuperation.  On Saturday July 2^nd I am committed to being second shooter for an 8 hour wedding (which means a 10-12 hour day).  Notice, I said SECOND shooter, lest anyone get the idea that I am back in business.  I am still 100% retired so no need to call for an appointment.  A second shooter is the photographer who clicks about 2,000 photos throughout the event, removes the camera cards from their camera, hands the unprocessed cards to the principle shooter (the business owner who has the contract with the wedding couple), and then walks away with no post production work.  I dearly love the shooting, posing, running around to catch that “perfect moment” and then handing over those cards!  Post production takes hours of intensive art work and book designs.  With as busy as my days are now I sometimes wonder how I had time to actually work.

 

WHAT I HAVE DISCOVERED TO BE TRUE

By Kathleen Martens

June 17, 2016

 

There comes a time when we dream

Of unhurried days in the sun, 

That time of doing nothing

So we can lollygag and have some fun.

 

Those days sound oh so sweet.

It is almost is worth it to get old.

And those days of retirement to come,

From a distance, they seem like gold.

 

But, oh let me tell you

What I have discovered to be true!

Now that I am retired,

One of Medicare’s true blue,

 

It seems my days are even busier

And I work harder than ever before.

Never a moment to call my own

And some days, don’t even get out the door.

 

From sun up to sun down

A project calls out my name.

Work beckons from every corner

And my house not easily tamed.

 

Just the same for my husband,

He’s never worked harder in his life.

But there is one good side,

He seems to have no strife.

 

Recently, as he left to go outside,

He spoke as his hand turned the knob,

“I don’t think I’ve ever worked so hard,

I think I’ll go out and get a real job.”

 

Oh, do I ever know what he means,

But being retired does have its perks.

Because I can now be my own boss,

And I wonder, “How did I ever have time to “work?”

 

Thank You God that I am retired as well as RE-FIRED!

Thank You God that I still have energy to do what must be done.

Thank You Lord for a joyful heart.

 

MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND WATCH OVER YOU BOTH DAY AND NIGHT.

 

Thursday June 16 2016  IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE…

 

It’s beginning to look a lot like a GARAGE SALE everywhere I go in this house!  Closets are coming apart, cupboards are being rummaged, boxes are opened, and in some instances the entire box, content and all are promptly curtailed to the garage.  Those boxes no longer have a place of honor under this roof.  And oh, it feels so good when the entire box goes out.  I have boxes of Christmas décor, and Thanksgiving décor, and even Halloween fall-DE-rill!  And then there is the occasional box I keep.  The one I kept today included my older cameras all the way back to the Box Camera that belonged to my parents.  It is the model you held at your waist and viewed an upside down rendition of what you planned to capture on film.  That camera took some awesome photos during my early childhood.  I think it would still work if I had some film to fit it.  I think I actually do have film that could probably be used but it is outdated.  Oh well, so is the camera outdated. 

I also came across Dave’s teddy bear that he loved as a baby and toddler.  In the same box was Courtland’s little teddy bear.  It was well loved but not nearly to the extent as Dave’s was.  Courtland helped me with the decision to keep them.  I think his boys would enjoy seeing them.  Both boys have had their own true loves sleeping with them these past few years.  And Xander is still in love with his soft stuffed animals.  He decorates his room with them.  And of course, I keep adding to his collage.    

Zach is now in the Lego and comic book stage.  So soon their babyhood is over.

Today was filled with eye tests, dilation, bright lights, and good news for the present.  I was being checked to see if my cataracts were ready to be surgically repaired and to confirm that I did not have a retinal disorder.  Over the years I have had some very major issues with my eyes and the result is I have permanent damage from past trauma and illnesses pertaining to them.  On one occasion I had a serious MRSA infection in both eyes and almost had to have one eye ball removed.  God intervened and I was spared having my eyeball taken out of my head.  I won’t go into details about much that has happened in the past, but because of so many traumas to my eyes there is damage control to be considered in order to keep my eyes as healthy as possible for as long as possible.

Because of my history of MRSA in the eye the surgeon does not think removing my cataracts is worth the risk.  My vision will be distorted but it is better than causing the MRSA to flare up.  Just in case you don’t know about MRSA it is a bacterial infection that is resistant to antibiotics.  There are some powerful antibiotic cocktails used to squelch it and sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t.  It is a major killer in post operative patients. 

There are some more points about the eye that I would like to discuss as an entire blog topic but will do so in the future as I am still having a bit of difficulty with the light due to my dilated eyes.  I just wanted my family to know that I am doing well and there is no surgery for me in the near future.  For that I am grateful.

Now, back to my upcoming garage sale.  Here goes!  I am “borrowing” a well known line from a song we all know…

 

IT’S BEGINNING TO LOOK A LOT LIKE…

By Kathleen Martens

June 16, 2016

 

It’s beginning to look a lot like

A garage sale everywhere I go,

The house is a mess I must confess,

Enough to make one depressed.

 

But I choose to look at the bright side

And enjoy everything I do.

I read the titles of the books,

And pick out just a few.

 

Just a few to keep that is,

The rest are up for sale.

Beloved books from the coat closet,

I swallow my moans and wails.

 

To give up a book not yet read

Is chivalry to say the least!

And to myself I am gracious,

For an unread book my feast.

 

Out go my pots and pans,

Brand spanking new ones already in place.

But I may sneak two back in…

If I have the space.

 

Holiday décor in great amounts

Spill out as I open lids,

I quickly fasten the tops back on

And will accept the highest bid.

 

What was once so beloved

Has betrayed me through the years.

The boxes sat around doing nothing,

And now from closets will no longer leer.

 

And so it is time to make it happen,

Downsizing “UP”* more time to give.

Without so much stuff to take care of,

Life will offer me more hours to live.

 

Empty cupboards and empty drawers,

And closets no longer cluttered.

That is the solace of beautiful peace

And no exasperation will be muttered!

 

Just so you know this the first round

Because there is so much to let go.

I don’t think there is room in the garage

For everything to even show.

 

And hopefully it will all happen

Making signs and pounding them in.

 

And I hope some big fat wallets come

With a host of women and men!

 

Thank You God that I do not need to have cataract surgery at the present.

Thank You Lord for my vision.

Thank You Father for loosening the binds of clutter!

Thank You Lord for kohlrabi.

 

GOOD NIGHT AND MAY GOD’S BLESSINGS BE UPON YOU!

*  Downsizing “UP” is a phrase I read in Marni Jameson’s book, “DOWNSIZING THE FAMILY HOME”.  She states that as we downsize all that we own we are actually downsizing “UP”, because without all the clutter and things to take care of, the quality of our life will be much improved.  We will actually have the time to do what we love to do instead of just taking care of all our belongings and a big house!  So, instead of “DOWN” sizing, we are “UP” sizing!

 

 

Wednesday June 15 2016  WHO IS THE STRANGER?

We are but one among millions.  Do you ever wonder if there is even one stranger with whom your paths cross who gives you a second thought?   Do you ever wonder about people who are shopping beside you, or the person across from you as you are going up in the same elevator?  Do you wonder about the man or woman who is sitting across from you in a waiting room?  Me, I wonder about everything and just about everyone with whom I come in contact.  And here I am even wondering if you ever wonder. 

One of my most interesting things to wonder about is people.  I enjoy starting conversations with complete strangers and listening to their stories.  I enjoy learning about their differences, their backgrounds, and more about who they are.  Why?  Well, for heaven’s sake, I don’t have a clue why I like to wonder.  Maybe some would just call me nosey; others might see it as rude.  Or maybe God just made me that way.

One thing that intrigues me are tattoos.  I always wonder about the story behind the tattoo.  When a person opens up and shares the why, the where, and the purpose of their tattoo, so much is said in a short conversation.  Their stories tell so much about who they are, their past pains, their future dreams, their passions and hope, and so much more.  What makes their stories especially interesting is that they are illustrated.  Though I have never felt the desire to have a tattoo myself, and on threat of our son’s life, I forbade him from having one as long as he lived at home.  However, I am still fascinated by the fact that people are willing to sit under the kneedle in order to declare their story in a quiet, yet visual form.  I think tattoos are signs waiting to be read.  It’s as if a tattoo has its own voice saying, “SEE ME!  SEE ME!”.   And so, if the situation presents itself, I simply say, “What is the story behind your tattoo?”  And our conversation begins.

You would not believe the stories I have heard.  The body decorations declare extreme loss, great celebration, some with regret, much joy, and pure pride and pleasure just to have the designs decorating their limbs, torsos, necks and face.  And some, I have been told, are even hidden.  If you ever want to engage with someone in a crowd choose someone with a tattoo and give it a try.  The worst that can happen is they look at you with disdain and walk away (which has not yet happened to me), and at the best thing that can happen is that you just might get an interesting story.  And I like stories.

Today I was shopping and saw a young woman with a unique hair style.  I commented on it and it opened the door to conversation.  She had tattoos also but she said there were no stories behind them.  After speaking with her a few moments I realized that at least one of her tattoos spoke loud and clear once I found out that she is a dancer and yoga instructor.  Her name is Nicole and I asked her if she would share a bit of her story.  She graduated with a Dance and Yoga major and is now working in Egypt as a dance and yoga instructor at an international school.  Just the fact that she arrived home two days ago from Egypt for a visit fueled my pump with all kinds of questions.  I asked many questions and Nicole seemed patient and kind as she shared about her job and the Egyptian culture.  Before we parted I asked her if she would speak the wisdom she has learned.  Here is Nicole’s words:

“I would say for me, the most things I’ve learned are to just take chances and take risks no matter if it’s pushing you a little bit out of your comfort zone.  Those are the ways in which you learn and you grow.  If you always just stay where you are you never really get to experience how other people live.”

I loved her comments.  Last year as I traveled I did just that.  I took chances and I took risks.  I approached people and heard a lot of stories along my journey.  Yes, I was still in the United States and Canada but out of the way places are truly like a different society.  It was amazing to experience so many unbelievable places and meet so many interesting people. There were some places in the south which actually made me feel as if I were in another country.  Though many of my experiences were short I will forever have the memories of what I did, who I met, and where I was.  And the great thing I have discovered is, if you are willing to take chances, like questioning a total stranger about their tattoo, you can discover a whole new world just in that one person.  Regardless of who I meet I always seem to walk away a richer person than I was before I met them.  And you know what?  I believe people like to be noticed.  If they don’t, they’ll let you know and the conversation will be very short.

Thank you Nicole for being so kind as you listened to an older woman.  And even more thanks for opening up and sharing a bit of your own story.  You made my day brighter. 

 

YOU MAY MISS OUT

By Kathleen Martens

June 15, 2016

 

So many strangers we pass every day

In their silent world, going on their way.

But who are they, these faces I see?

What do they wonder when they look at me?

 

The world is so big, yet so small

And we are silent, refraining to call.

We keep to ourselves, reading smart-phones

Without being attuned to another’s moans.

 

Who is that man, that boy, or that girl

With their busy lives, lived in a whirl?

Do they even care who I am?

Would they help me if I were in a jam?

 

Or would I help them in their plight

If another engaged them to fight?

Am I willing to help another,

Whether it be friend, stranger or brother?

 

When we are not friendly, what do we miss

As we pass silently in a great abyss?

What would happen if we said hello again?

Would there be a chance to make a friend?

 

Are you willing to chance a few words?

Or are you concerned you might not be heard?

Take a risk and give it a try,

You might be helping another to fly.

 

It may be hard to get rid of your phone,

Or to step out of your comfort zone.

But by doing so is how you grow,

And with each step, your learning will show.

 

When you reach and to others you give,

You may then experience how another person lives.

Don’t stay where you are until your end,

You may miss finding your very best friend!

 

Thank You God for the courage You give me.

Thank You for all the wonderful people I meet.

Thank You Lord for all the wonderful opportunities You provide for me.

Thank You for garage sales.

Thank You for my new pots and pans.

 

GOD BLESS EACH OF YOU. 

GOOD NIGHT!

Tuesday June 14 2016  IT TAKES A LOT OF TIME

Just in case you haven’t arrived yet, I have a few things to tell you.  Arrive where, you may ask?  Well, the destination to which I refer to is at the entrance of old age.  Yep!  That would be where I am now, although I do not feel old.  More than likely I look older than I feel.  And the fact that I want to share with you is, the fact that “IT TAKES A LOT OF TIME” to be old.  Not only does it take a lot of time to arrive at that door, it seems that the arrival time is different for each individual.  And I don’t feel like I am truly over the threshold as of yet, but I certainly have some of the symptoms of the door opening wider.

There is much involved in the aging process.  Genetics, health, self abuse, nutrition, exercise, active lifestyle verses sedentary lifestyle, where you live, career choices, and even economics, are all contributing factors to how quickly we do, or do not age.  And the list could go on.

When I was younger I didn’t understand why people spent an hour or two at the gym each day.  I wondered if they didn’t have enough to do, or perhaps just didn’t have a “real life”.  I thought of it as a very selfish and self pampering behavior.  It just seemed trivial to me.  Sorry folks.  I hope that doesn’t make me look as bad as I think it does by sharing my naivety and lack of wisdom of the immature self that I once was.  Now I am viewing life from the opposite view.  I am on the upper spectrum of my earth years so perhaps I have learned just a few things. 

After I regained my health and vigor of my youth after eating less and joining a gym, all of a sudden it was as if the scales fell off my eyes.  After recapturing so much of what I had lost physically, I now realize that the people who go to the gym faithfully really do not just “have” the time to do it but they must persevere and create the time to do so.  These are the people who do have a life.  Sometimes when we give up one thing to accomplish an even greater thing, we receive benefits that far outweigh what we have given up.

I know personally I sacrifice hours in my days to make certain that I get to the gym to workout.  And those two hours a day, along with eating healthy and doing my best to make certain I have adequate rest, have restored me to a place that I never thought was possible.  A little over three years ago I could barely get up out of a chair and it was always with great pain that I did so.  Now I don’t even think about it anymore.

However, just because I can get up out of a chair and go the gym on a regular basis, believe me, I am still aging.  The years take a toll on the human body no matter how much you do “right”, how much rest you receive, or even how active you might be.  Sometimes it is because of being so active which can cause the nuances of that which plagues you.  For me, it is now my elbow and shoulder.  I thought I was mightier that I was and tried to move something I had no power to move.  And, it is continuing to haunt me with limited use of the right arm, shoulder and hand.  Physical therapy hasn’t fixed it, and according to my MRI, the tears in my rotatory cuff are not serious enough to qualify for surgery.  I can’t help but wonder if it is because of my age?  So I am again in the midst of another round of therapy.  And therapy takes time.  And old age just keeps sneaking up on me.  One day at a time.  It can pounce on us or sometimes it sneaks up very quietly to surprise us.  And usually it is only one “little” thing at a time and we adjust and get used to the time it takes to pamper the intruder, and like a thief in the night, another one wriggles right past the alarm system.  And every little thing adds up and each malady takes a little bit more of your time to prepare for the day or to prepare for bed, or more to take with you when you go someplace.  And that is what I mean when I say “IT TAKES A LOT OF TIME” just being older!

Now I know why people need to retire.  It takes time to take care of these old bodies!  Just don’t be surprised at all the little surprises that pop up along the pathway as we trudge to the top of the hill.  As for me, I choose to meander on the way up and take time to smell the roses.  And if truth be told, I am enjoying each day I live, regardless how much time it takes me to do, what I used to could do, so much more quickly.  I don’t have as much time as I used to but as long as I can drive myself to the gym I will at least show up.  I want to do as much as I can for as long as I can.  For me personally old age is not a destination; it is a place I aspire to go in order to finish some of my dreams that I’ve yet to fulfill. It is so much better to be old when you think of the alternative.  So, even as I slow down, God is still by my side giving me the strength I need for each moment I live.  We are never promised tomorrow.  I just thank God each day for every moment he allows me to walk on this earth.  And I especially thank God for each and every day that Dave and I share this road together. 

No matter where you are in life, stop and give praise to the one who made you, as well as who died for you, so that you will someday live eternally  with Him in heaven.  That is where my pathway is leading.  Where is your pathway taking you?

 

I KNOW ONE THING CERTAIN

By Kathleen Martens

June 14, 2016

 

The end of the road

Is not really the end,

When the one waiting

Is your truest Friend.

 

No matter how steep

Or rugged the path,

Or however wearisome,

It will not last.

 

The end is in sight

When you’ve come so far.

When You reach the top

Your sight can’t be marred.

 

The highway of life

Takes twists and turns,

As well as experiences

That helped us learn.

 

We are to keep our focus

On the God who loves all.

God designed a perfect plan

That we would not fall.

 

He commanded each one

To honor father and mother

That our days would be long

On earth with our brothers.

 

And when we have wisdom,

Days are added to life,

So man and woman live longer

As husband and wife.

 

So I thank God daily

For years on this earth,

For hours and moments

Are all of great worth.

 

And though I am older,

My privilege complete

When God calls me home

And Jesus I meet.

 

And so it takes longer

To do as I must,

At least I can move

And hopefully won’t rust.

 

So I accept each day

As a precious jewel,

And study Gods Scripture,

My most treasured tool.

 

And as I walk

Through these later years,

I know one thing certain,

Closer to God I draw near.

 

Deuteronomy 5:16

¹⁰ “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom,
And the knowledge of the Holy One is understanding.
¹¹ For by me your days will be multiplied,
And years of life will be added to you.”

 

Thank You God for however many days I left on this earth.

Thank You for creating me.

Thank You Lord for all our talks and hours we have spent together.

Thank You for all the days I have lived.

Thank You for creating asparagus.

Thank You that Dave walks beside me.

I love You so much God!

 

HAVE A GREAT AFTERNOON AND BLESSED TOMORROW. 

 

Monday June 13 2016  BOXES OF MY MOTHER’S MEMORIES

So many memories packed away in boxes.  I went through two boxes today that seemed to take hours.  Small items to sort through; letters, personal tablets (the paper kind), eye glasses, my grandfather’s pocket knife, baby clothes, aprons that come with stories, and a varied assortment of other small memorabilia which my mother thought important enough to give me many years before she died.  My mother knew how I loved going back over the history of our family, those I knew, those she knew, and some who my grandmother told me about.  The farthest generation back that I met was my mother’s grandmother (my great grandmother) when I was 8 years old.

When I met my great grandmother she was in a “rest home” facility.  She was always referred to as Great Grandma Lowe. Her first name was Mary.  She had dementia and was also bed-ridden.  I remember that she showed me her “baby”.  It was a large, life-sized, hard rubber doll.  It was wrapped in a blanket and she hugged it to her.  Of course I didn’t understand the situation and was quite confused.  I definitely knew it was NOT a baby.   THE LOOK my mother gave me, insured that I would not ask questions, nor say anything about the fact that her baby was just a doll.  I was skeptical of my grandmother after that.  However, I was very glad I met her.

My oldest sister has relayed to me a few of her earliest memories of “Great Grandma Lowe”.  My sister found her quite harsh and unfriendly toward most of her grandchildren except a favored few.  Her first husband died of food poisoning about the time my Grandmother married in 1917.   Her mother remarried and though she divorced her second husband, she was always remembered and referred to by her second husband’s last name.  What I must keep in mind is that Great Grandma Lowe was my mother’s grandmother and my mama dearly loved her grandma.  She always spoke very highly of her.

When I received the endowment of my mama’s correspondence there were a few old greeting card boxes filled with her most cherished letters.  I could tell by the tenor of the letter from her grandma that the two were probably closer than I realized. Grandma Lowe died when I was 10 years old.  She was up in her 90’s.  All three of my last three maternal ancestors lived into their 90’s and all three had dementia. 

Today was a tough day as far as letting go of anything in those two boxes.  Both were the size of a fruit box and they were given to me in person by mother about 20 years ago.  She described each item to me, labeling some, and told me the stories that she remembered about the items.  I decided that those two boxes would be keepsakes to pass on to my children.  I am going to save one large suitcase to pack all the historical family treasures from both Dave’s family and my family.  I will only keep what will fit into the suitcase.  I too would like to pass them on and let our children see some of the handmade items that belonged to their ancestors. 

One reason it took so long to go through these boxes was that I re-read the letters and notes attached to all the items.  I handled each relic, tried on the apron that belonged to my grandfather’s mother (who was a tall and enormously wide woman), and then held up my mother’s, mother’s house-dress (which I remember her wearing), comparing it to my frame.  My mother’s mama was very short and quite round.  Most of her dresses were made to look like long sacks with a tie around the middle that always rode up and snuggled under her pendulous bosoms and protruding round belly.  She looked like she would be soft to hug but I don’t ever remember receiving a hug from her.  But somehow I always knew she loved me, she just didn’t know how to show it.

Come to think of it, I don’t remember any hugs from my mother either.  I’m sure she held me close when I was a baby but by the time I was a few years old, and old enough to retain memories, her physical or verbal displays of affection ceased to exist.  She was never touched in a loving way and therefore she did not learn how to pass that touch on.  Once I was grown however, I never thought for one moment that I was not loved by her.  But what I learned from my childhood was that I knew how I did not want to parent.  I was successful in changing that pattern.  And so many memories came flooding back just now when I looked back to earlier this afternoon when my son was leaving our house after lunch.  I was working at the sink and we were alone for a few moments in the kitchen.  He came and stood by me, held his arms wide open and gathered me into his embrace.  His strong muscles enveloping me as he caressed my back.  My arms were tight around him, my face turned to one side against his chest, enjoying this precious love moment with my son who was, and still is, so dearly loved. I had intentionally changed the patterns of my family’s culture which made it so natural for him to express his affection so honestly and easily.

So you can see all the memories that opening a couple of boxes can construe.  The more emotions and memories I experience makes me all the more see the wisdom in keeping a house downsized yearly, monthly, weekly, and even daily.   I’m trying but I’m not very good at it yet.  But I’m really trying.  Just taking notice of what both our children are doing, in keeping things from becoming cluttered, is giving me more and more incentive to be successful.  Because of living their growing up years with a mom who became so attached to everything, they too knew how they didn’t want to live as adults.  I am happy that they were able to change the patterns of our immediate family’s culture.

 

TREASURES FROM GENERATIONS PAST

By Kathleen Martens

June 13, 2016

 

What to do is the big question,

Do I save or give it away?

Perhaps it’s my children who should decide

How I should handle this decision today.

 

What about the things I remember?

The memories made in my past?

And the keepsakes that I have saved

Helping my memory to last.

 

So what to do with another’s memories?

Do I keep them to enjoy while I live?

Should I tell the stories to our children

Hoping the relics to another generation give?

 

And now those treasures from generations past

In boxes, are long dejected,

And I’m concerned that in future generations

The contents will be rejected.

 

My mother’s keepsakes were hers alone

About those who came before.

I was there to hear some stories,

And I always wanted to know more.

 

Memories seem to spill from my heart

As I think about the past.

But a lot of memories are not mine

When I’m gone they will not last.

 

God, I thank You that I can still recall my memories.

And Lord, thank You for reminding me that my treasures are not of this world but those I have deposited in heaven.

Thank You for all Your blessings in my life and providing me with so much.

Thank You for a loving son and daughter.

Thank You too for making it so much easier for me to release “things”.

Thank You for Your amazing grace!

 

GOOD NIGHT AND MAY GOD BLESS YOU WITH WISDOM AND INSIGHT AS YOU LIVE EACH DAY.

P.S.

Actually, the poem you just read was written in the exact reverse order of stanzas than what you read above.  I first read the poem to Dave as it was originally written. I then asked him to again listen while I read it starting with the last stanza first and then reading the next to last stanza as the second verse, and so on with each of the verses.  No need to bother reading the original rendition below if it is too confusing, but you may find it interesting to see how my brain worked in writing the stanzas in reverse order first, not realizing I would like the reversed order best.  Oh yes, I did change a few words here and there.

 

TREASURES FROM GENERATIONS PAST

By Kathleen Martens

June 13, 2016

 

Memories seem to spill from my heart

As I think about the past.

But a lot of memories are not mine

When I’m gone they will not last.

 

My mother’s keepsakes are hers alone

Of those who came before.

I was there to hear some stories,

And I always wanted to know more.

 

And now those treasures from generations past

In boxes, are long dejected,

And I’m concerned that in future generations

The contents will be rejected.

 

So what to do with another’s memories?

Do I keep them to enjoy while I live?

Should I tell the stories to our children

Hoping the relics to another generation give?

 

And what about the things I remember?

The memories made in my past?

And the keepsakes that I have saved

Helping my memory to last.

 

What to do is the big question,

Do I save or give it away?

Perhaps it’s my children who should decide

How I should handle it today.

 

GOOD NIGHT AGAIN!

Sunday Sabbath June 12 2016   LUNCH, BLOG, AND NAP!

On Sunday I always peruse the next week’s calendar so as to be prepared for what is coming.  This particular week has a lot coming!  As I viewed it a few moments ago I could just imagine all my hopes for accomplishments dissolving into thin air.  I am down to less than two weeks to collect from closets and drawers and shelves and floor and shop and studio and garage and…and…everywhere else I am planning to scour for valuable to sell in 10 days.  It is a daunting task.

Why did I allow so many other appointments to gain importance, you may ask? I didn’t plan for any of them to be there.  One is a physical therapy appointment because I having so much trouble with my torn rotator cuff.  Another one is an emergency eye appointment because of an eye situation that has developed in my right eye.  Both eyes are affected but the right seems to be in worse condition.  Another event is a commitment I have twice a year that I do not want to forego.  And there are actually a couple of other entries but I can’t remember what they are.  Oh, and one day (next Sunday is both Father’s day as well as my husband’s birthday).  We always try to have the birthday party on the actual birth date. 

Since the birthday party is a dinner party here I must also prepare for that.  There are some things that just can’t wait.  Remember what I said a few days ago about making a person’s day of birth a memorable occasion?  I want to do that for Dave.

If you really want the truth, I’d rather be taking a nap than writing at this precise moment.  And that says a lot!  I NEVER LIKE TO TAKE NAPS!  But, there comes a day (like today) when my body needs, craves, longs, desires, and insists that I MUST REST AND NAP!  So that is what I plan to do when I finish here at the computer.  By revealing this I feel as if I am confessing the fact that I am aging.  And in order to stay on top of my game this weekend I will succumb to the idea.

 

LUNCH, BLOG, AND NAP

By Kathleen Martens

June 12, 2016

 

Lunch, blog, and nap

In precisely that order.

I will lie down and rest

And stop being a sorter.

 

I’ll set aside the boxes,

The closets, shelves and larder.

And pay attention to what I need

Though for me it will be harder.

 

I’d much rather be up,

Making inroads in my plans.

But my eyelids are drooping,

And I can barely stand.

 

Well, maybe it’s not quite that bad

But for my poem it sounded good.

I only wish I could do more work,

And I’d do it if I possibly could.

 

But I will listen with my heart

To what my body is saying.

I want to stay as strong as I can

And the price is the nap I’m paying.

 

Short and sweet will be my blogs

For this week and the next,

Because I have much to accomplish

Without becoming vexed.

 

Have a great day my blogger friends

I send greetings and a “GOD BLESS YOU”.

May God protect you from all harm

As you do what you must do.

 

Thank You God for common sense.

Thank You for a strong body.

And Lord, I even thank You for my weak hands for they are Your hands.

Thank You for prunes.

Thank You again for my wonderful husband! (Maybe I should have put this line above the prunes).

 

 

 

 

 

Saturday June 11 2016  A FILLED UP DAY

 

10:41 p.m.  Just arrived home.  Below is the story of my day.

 

HOME AGAIN

By Kathleen Martens

June 11, 2016

 

From sun up to now

Not a moment to stop,

And now that it’s late

I need to plop!

 

My morning begins

Soft and sweet.

I say Good morning to God,

Unnecessary to tweet.

 

Ready to leave for the gym

But waylaid by the phone

Which was a desperate call.

So I stayed home.

 

Then off again

Determined to sweat.

Which I accomplished

Without any fret.

 

Home again to meet

A friend that dropped by

Who is interested

In our couch to buy.

 

Then off to prepare lunch

Ate and then left

To honor a graduate

Who is quite deft.

 

And then off we drove,

Grand children to see,

And to enjoy a movie

Which is always free.

 

Then roasted marshmallows,

Added chocolate and crackers,

Which made two little boys

Quite the little zappers.

 

And now we are home

My body like led.

So a poem for a blog

Before I go to bed.

 

Thank You God for watching over us this day.

Thank You Lord for the beautiful memories made today.

Thank You for the wonderful sermons I listened to this morning while exercising.

Thank You for a son who has a truck.

Thank You for cold grapes.

 

Good night and God bless you

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Friday June 10 2016 REMINISCING

We are now the parents of a middle aged adult!  Am I correct in thinking that 40 is still considered the beginning of “middle aged”?  So, am I still in the middle age too?  The determining factor seems to get a bit blurry when it refers to oneself.  Someone “OLD” has always been someone 10 years older than I am currently!  So perhaps to the 40 year olds, Dave and I have long ago entered the category of the “elderly”.  All I really know for certain is, that age is just number and we (you and I) are just who we are, regardless our age.

That is the way I choose to think of it.  As I look out from my eye view and talk to younger people I actually forget that I am standing there in front of them exposing all the ravages that take a toll on the “older” body.  When I see the young people, in my spirit I become one of them, and I forget that I am any older than they are.  Perhaps it’s because my spirit is eternal and never ages, and it is the young me that shows up for the younger crowd.  And then I remember what I see from the inside looking out is something totally different from what the younger generation sees from the outside looking in.  Oh well, the fantasy world is sometimes the best place to exist…at least at my age.  The important thing at my age is to know the difference.  

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLING DAUGHTER!  WISH I WERE IN FLORIDA CELEBRATING WITH YOU! 

Can’t wait for you to open your gift.  I promise you, it will not add one item more to what you already own.  Remember, it is the thought that counts!!!

Forty years ago today I was at work on Thursday June 10^th when I received “THE CALL” from our friend Peggy.  Peggy is the person that God used to be instrumental in connecting Dave and me with the birth mother of our child.  This is what I wrote down when Peggy gave me the news that Rebecca was born.

“6  6oz

19 ½ ”

2:00

No hair”

That was it!  I wrote the note because I didn’t want to forget a word that was said to me.  And those few words scribbled on that scrap of paper were all my brain could comprehend.  That simple message said, “I WAS A MOTHER”!  I kept that note in my pocket for the rest of the day and just kept touching it and re-reading it.  It was all I could do to believe it had really happened.   I still have that actual note taped in Rebecca’s baby album (the first child always gets the album).  I could barely contain myself at work.  I think they should have sent me home after I received that phone call.  I prepared in-office surgical trays and assisted with wound debridement, suture removal, and other office procedures.  It is a wonder I could even think to perform protocol.  I could barely focus on what I was doing.

Dave and I went to the hospital that evening and we didn’t even have the opportunity to touch Rebecca.  We just stood at the window and longingly wished we could be included in the back room with her.  We went home without touching our daughter on the first day of her life.

The next evening we were again at the window gazing and wishing the same thing.  After a while a nurse peeked out from one of the nursery doors and asked why we were there.  I told the nurse it was just so heartbreaking to be so close to our daughter and not be able to touch her.  She looked at us quizzically and asked why we couldn’t touch her.  We explained about the fact that we were the adoptive parents and had no rights as of yet.  She told us to follow her.  She took us to a room, told us to wash and gown up and she would be right back.  OH MY GOODNESS!  She came back holding all 6 pound 6  ½ ounces  of our little, “No hair”, baby girl.  I can’t even begin to tell you the love that God poured into my heart in that special moment.  We knew for six months that this baby was promised to us.  Our love was already planted but it became a symphony when she was placed into my arms.  The nurse snapped a photo and it has been displayed in a prominent place in every home we have lived in since that time.  It is still my very favorite photo of our new family.

As I gazed at Rebecca as I cradled her in my arms that first time I remember thinking that all the potential of the person she would someday be was in my safekeeping.  I don’t know what Dave was thinking, but for me it was a serious, exciting, nerve racking, and a most unbelievable moment in time.  I knew that I had to protect her, advocate for her, fight for her if need be.  I took parenting very seriously, and probably, on occasions, went overboard.   When our children were quite young I could see that I did not like the influence of television in their lives and we weaned them from watching television.  I wanted Dave and I to be the ones who influenced what went into our children’s vulnerable minds.  No television seemed a bit strict to some but I have never regretted removing it from their life.  That first moment when I held her I looked into her puckered up face and realized that everything she could be was wrapped in that little 6 pound 6 ½ ounce body.  It was at that moment I became a Mother Bear!  She was mine to protect.

It was necessary for the birth mother to be discharged from the hospital before we had legal rights to carry Rebecca from the hospital premises.  We arrived excited and early on Saturday morning.  We stopped by Carole’s room and told her how grateful we were for the amazing gift she gave us.  Carole was three months pregnant when we met her for the first time.  It was at the time she interviewed us as prospective parents.   Recently, when we visited her, and her husband David, she shared with me that after she interviewed us she did not interview any other couples.  She said she knew in her heart that we were the ones she wanted to parent her child.  We were her first choice.  Dave and I both believe with all of our hearts that Rebecca was, and still is, our gift from God.  What a blessing she has been to us through the years!

Forty years ago there was no such thing as “mandatory pregnancy leave” for adoptive parents or for fathers for that matter.  Of course the birthing mother was off a few weeks for recovery but that did not include me.  I took one week off as vacation and then had to leave Rebecca in the care of another person.  Day care was very difficult to find.  Large business day cares were in the beginning stages of becoming an accepted way of childcare.  The only thing was the large daycare would not accept a child who was under two years old.  Well, that left us out.  I had a neighbor that lived next door to where we had previously lived in Anaheim, California.   This former neighbor said she would she would watch Rebecca until we could find a home care provider.  On my first day back to work I dropped Rebecca off at about 7:30 a.m. and picked her up after 6:00 p.m.  When I walked in, I found Rebecca crying desperately in her carrier (an infant seat that reclined).  We lived quite close so I picked up the carrier, the neighbor gave me her diaper bag (we used cloth diapers), and I quickly walked to my car so I could get her home as quickly as possible.  I had no idea what was wrong.  When I arrived home and picked her up she was saturated from head to toe.  I looked in her diaper bag and all her bottles were still full.  And not one of her fresh diapers had been used.  Since the buckle was still latched across her chest I doubted if she had been picked up even once.   

Needless to say, I was distraught.  I took another week off work.  I did not call my former neighbor and I never went back to that woman’s house again.  I actually don’t think I even paid her.  I was too upset to even have a confrontation.  I felt like a neglectful mother for having left my baby in her care.  Today, I would report her.  I learned a great lesson that day.  And just for the record, she never called me to find out why I didn’t bring her back.

Fortunately within the week someone from my church called and told me about a woman in the church that did in home daycare that was close to my work.  She was unbelievable and Rebecca thrived in her care.  She only kept children through the first year of their life.  Rebecca was the only one she kept for two years.  She also was the provider for Courtland when he was born three years later.  However, she could not be convinced to keep him for year two!  I took him to another provider but was so apprehensive about leaving him that I quit work, pulled both the kids out of day care and was a stay at home mom on a budget.  And it was worth it!

So now, 40 years after it started it is over.  Our kids our grown, we are retired, and we still choose to live on a budget.  As much as I loved being the mom of little ones, I do so enjoy them as adults.  But every once in a while I cannot help myself and must ruminate those years that seem to get more gentle as time passes.  Those years were happy years and they were difficult years.  And they still make me smile.

 

REMINISCING

By Kathleen Martens

June 10, 2016

 

Diapers and bottles

Puke and poop,

Where the buck stops

That’s the scoop.

 

Peanut butter and jelly,

Messes galore,

Late night earaches.

And walking the floor.

 

Squabbles and squawks,

Bites and tantrums.

The story of toddlers

Is not a phantom.

 

And I asked

Will this time never end?

And so soon it was over

With no rest to lend.

 

Soccer and little league

Auditions and acting.

For things to do

Were never lacking.

 

Marching band

As well as football,

Musicals to watch

Spring and fall.

 

Our adventures mounted

As kids grew.

They were always involved

In something new.

 

Then all grown

As they flitted around

Until finally

They settled down.

 

And too soon

It was all over

And I’m retired

Living life in clover.

 

Do I secretly long

For days long passed?

Not on your life

Should that be asked!

 

I still dream

To fulfill many plans.

Every day I work

To do as much as I can.

 

But it’s fun to reminisce

Because I am free

For I am allowed

To at last be me.

Job 8: 8-11  (NIV)

Thank You Lord for the times when You rescued our children from the jaws of death.

Thank You too for Your angels that hover around us.

Thank You for the lovely lady I met at the Attic Angel Fund Raiser today.

Thank You for peanut butter and jelly.

 

GOOD NIGHT TO ALL AND TO ALL A GOOD NIGHT.  GOD BLESS YOU.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thursday June 9 2016   THE POWER OF A LETTER

Yesterday I finished the book “DOWNSIZING THE FAMILY HOME” by Marni Jameson.  A very appropriate book for me to read at this crossroad of my life.  Extremely well written and informative in regards to downsizing personal belongings or closing down an aged parent’s home who have perhaps died or moving to as assisted living facility.  She speaks about dispersing the contents of the home, what venues certain items should be sold, example: eBay, Craig’s List, garage sale, donate, throw away, or keep.  She goes into detail as what should be kept as permanent records.

There were a lot of interesting scenarios about dispersing the contents of the family home.  This kind of situation often causes a lot of upset, hard feelings, and permanent derision with siblings facing this event.  Years before my mother entered the abyss of dementia she purposely started sorting her personal belongings.  She wanted to give certain people certain items so she made contact with them and offered the items to them.  She corresponded with many people over the years of her life and I believe she kept ever single letter ever written to her.  Since our family was strung out across the United States and email was not available back then, there were a lot of cassette tapes passed back and forth as well as letters, cards and notes.  I was included in this correspondence because every phone call we made out of our area code was costly.

By the time my mom died at 91 the contents of her entire life fit in a bedroom.  Yes, there were things she had kept and everything was neatly stacked, waiting for heirs to claim their endowment.  She had five daughters living.  Both of her sons died before she did.  Mama’s one request was that no one would fight over anything which had belonged to her. 

My eldest sister was in charge of the “event”.  Four daughters were present and no one else.  One daughter chose not to come due to hard feelings that already existed between the sisters unrelated to mama’s death.  The absent sister had given a list of what she would like to choose and asked another sister to be her voice.  My oldest sister gave each of us a sheet of paper and a pen.  Each one of us was to write on the paper what it was that we most desired.  If what was written down was different we would all receive our first choice.  This way there was no hierarchy of going from oldest to youngest each time we wrote a request.  As long as no one chose the same item in a given round we each received what was written on our paper. 

Over and over again choices were made.  There were no duplicates on any same round until the very end when there were just small items left of really no consequential value.  Actually there wasn’t anything of value monetarily when we started.  Primarily everything was just memories and sentiments of the past.  When I chose something toward the end that one of my sisters chose, it was easy for me to let it go because I could tell it meant more to them.  There were really only a few things I desired.   The first two I chose were mama’s correspondence and journals, and her Mother’s ring (which I had purchased for her years before).  One other item I also desired was the last Bible mama used at the end of her reading days.  I had a feeling my youngest sister also wanted it so I purposely did not choose it in the first round to see if it was her favorite.  It was.  I was happy for her, but a little sad for myself.  Are there times when I wish I could still rifle through the pages that were so well worn and read mama’s notations?  Yes, but I just pray that the Bible will give my sister comfort.  Mama’s death was extremely difficult for her.

My oldest sister chose not to participate in choosing anything from mama’s belongings.  I would have been better off space-wise if I had done the same thing.  Now I have shelves full of her old correspondence, minus the letters I really wanted.  As mama re-read all her correspondence late in life she set aside each person’s letters who had corresponded with her on a regular basis and mailed them all back to each individual.  I remember receiving a large stack of my own letters.  During the early years of my children’s lives I did not write a consistent journal so I lost a lot of their growing up years that I wish I had logged.  I often regretted that so many stories and accomplishments in their young lives were not written down while the experience was fresh in my mind.  Well, when I re-read the letters, many 10 or 12 pages long, hand written, there was story after story of all the daily happenings in our lives during those years.  I was delighted to have them back.  I just wasn’t delighted to know that I didn’t get to peek in all my aunts’ and cousins’ personal letters!  (Shame on me!)  Mama was a wise old soul.

I have not finished reading all that was written to her in those rubber made containers that I carted home.  I did learn some interesting tidbits however.  I had no idea about all the things my mother was busy doing for others.  There were so many nice letters and cards and wonderful thank you notes included in the bins I carted home.  Remember, this was the time when people actually wrote letters and sent cards.  It was so refreshing to see all the wonderful, kind, and generous acts my mother did for so many others.  She worked tirelessly all her life, did not gossip, and rarely told anything about her undercover acts of kindness and generosity.  It put a smile in my heart to see how she was perceived by so many.  I believe my endowment in those bins of correspondence was more valuable than if those bins had been filled with gold.  Mama loved God and she walked His path in all areas of her life.  I also have her journals and have read a scattering of them.  Nowhere in her journals does she ever mention what she had done for another.  I would never have known her as well as I do now had I not read the cards written to her.  I think I made a good choice choosing her journals and correspondence.

There is so much more I could tell you but I have already gone over my quota of words.  I said all that to say this, I think the way mama’s possessions were handled was a mighty fine idea.  None of us walked away disappointed or angry.  We honored mama’s request.  If you are facing a similar situation give some discussion as to how you might best handle the circumstances for all involved before the problems or hurt feelings crop up.  And you just might want to read Marni Jameson’s book.

Following is a poem that I thought would be more appropriate than anything I could write again.  As you can see this poem was written over 4 years ago but I would like to share it with you.  And remember, it’s never too late to send someone a greeting by mail.  It is sure to put a smile on their face.

 

The Gift of a Letter

Kathleen Martens

March 21, 2012

 

Simple words written down

By someone of no great renown.

From the heart written true

To convey a message new.

 

Words of thought written with pleasure

That someday become someone’s treasure.

Informative or perhaps mundane

To be carried down the lane.

 

Touched by fingers, composed from heart,

Folded neatly to depart,

Slipped inside a flat cocoon

To be delivered very soon.

 

Stamped and licked before it’s sent

And when received seal is rent.

Then a smile lights anew

Knowing someone thought of you!

 

Thank You God for wonderful memories.

Thank You God for a mother who loved You.

And Thank You for a mother who loved me.

Thank You Lord that we are Your letters.

 

GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS YOU.

 

P.S.

I wrote another poem just now to add to the one above.

 

SENT WITH LOVE

By Kathleen Martens

June 9, 2016

 

Thank You God for the gift of letters,

Thank You for words spoken true.

Scribbled pictures and holiday cards

Are all smiles stamped to view.

 

Thank You for the sunshine

That words quietly bring.

When like apples of gold

 They cause the heart to sing.

 

Thank You God for thoughts

Others share from their heart

So that our ordinary day

Will have a lovely start.

 

Thank You for envelopes

That are neatly sealed,

Sent with so much love

For you, only revealed.

 

I hope you receive a lovely letter from someone soon!

 

 

 

 

Wednesday June 8 2016  WHERE DOES A DAY GO?

Busy all day, but what have I accomplished?  Is that a question you ever ask yourself?  I would rather be able to see results for what I do, rather than have a lot of little things to do that just take up time.  And that was what today was all about.  Very short time to write tonight and I have some interesting things I hope to eventually write about before I forget them.   

Earlier today while in meditation with the Lord I felt that I was to share what I wrote yesterday morning in my journal.  So this blog will be short and I will use a poem I wrote yesterday.  I wrote a very short poem earlier today but you get yesterday’s leftover.  It came as a song and I realized it when I wrote the first line.  I like it when I write lyrics that I would love to see put to music.  Someday I think it will happen.  One thing I have is lots of hope.

Following the poem are the words I received in my heart when I finished writing the lyrics.

 

I AM HERE TO WORSHIP YOU

By Kathleen Martens

June 7, 2016

 

I am here to worship You,

I am here to give praise

To the Almighty King of kings,

The creator of all days.

 

I am here to worship You

And glorify Your great name,

You who died for my sin,

Your blood covering my shame.

 

I am here to worship You,

The Almighty who reigns on high.

The giver of all life and love

Who sacrificed Himself to die.

 

I am here to worship You Lord,

My Strong Tower against the foe.

For You have overcome the world,

Your spirit is wherever I go.

 

I am here to worship You

For the renewing of my mind,

And for Your transforming me

To be as Your like kind.

 

I am here to worship You,

For You keep me in perfect peace.

And Your love is everlasting,

My hope in You will never cease.

 

I am here to worship You Lord

Just for who You Are,

The God and Creator of the universe,

My bright and shining star.

 

Sing a new song in your heart.  Continually lift My name.  Focus on My scripture to understand more about who I Am.  Now are your days to seek out who I Am.  Fill yourself with the knowledge of your Creator.  I Am the Beginning, the First and the Last.  I long for my children to know Me.  I desire the intimacy we share.  Come and know My heart just as I know yours.  You are created for My pleasure.  It is My joy to share My love with you.  I will never leave you or forsake you.  Come and drink from My fountain of life and My river of delight will flow through you.  My arms are everlasting.  Come and be with Me.  Rest in My presence.

God delights in the time we focus on Him.  It may be while we’re in the car driving to work, lying in bed at night or just sitting in a chair.   We need to focus on His love for us as we give Him praise and thanks for who He Is.  And remember to listen to what God may be speaking into your heart.

 

Thank You God for the words You impress upon me.

Thank You for loving me so deeply.

Thank You Father that nothing can separate me from the love that You have for me.

Romans 8:38-39 

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS EACH OF YOU!

 

Tuesday June 7 2016  HEADING SOUTH

It is a late night for me and I’m just beginning to type my blog.  So I do hope it is very short as I would like to get up by 4:30 a.m. or a little after.

As we age, which all of us are currently actively doing, our bodies are continually changing.  We see the most rapid changes in newborns as we witness their fast growing bodies changing by the week.  We watch the toddler and school age kids and notice the yearly changes as they grow and mature.  The years mount on into adolescence, teen years, and then young adults.  And all the while cells are multiplying and dividing, dying as others rejuvenate the body.  And for a long time things seems to go steadily along, not much outward change, but a lot going on inside those wonderful machines we so often take for granted.  We may put on a few pounds (or a lot), exercise or not, eat too much or not enough, and we really don’t give our bodies much thought or appreciation.  UNTIL…

All of a sudden we feel a bit creaky here or there.  One day it might be something simple like a big toe with shooting pain.  Another day we wake up and an elbow might be a little cranky.  A few days pass and all works well until we wake up and put our feet on the ground and find that the knee has a shooting pain in it that wasn’t there when we got up in the middle of the night for a bathroom run.  And as many parts as the body has, any one part might bring to your attention that it too has a gripe.  And as quickly as a few minutes, a few hours or even a few days the pain will just disappear as quickly and unexpectedly as it made its appearance.

Well, that happens more and more frequently as the years pass.  I used to look at really old people (the ones who were 50 or older) and wonder how did they get so decrepit.  Well, I will be glad to inform you how.  First of all it didn’t just happen all in one day.  No sir!  It snuck up on them silently and unaware, just one little part of them “going south” at a time.  First the toe, then the elbow, then the knee and all of the other little surprises.  They go and come like quiet thieves in in the night.  You never know how they got in but they can sure cause a lot of damage.

Dave and I call our sneaky little visitors “The flavor of the day”.  But now as Dave and I have gotten older than we ever thought imaginable, those little visitors seem to hang on a bit longer, are not so inclined to leave as quickly as they came.  And slowly it becomes a constant companion.  As I was thinking about this morning while I was journaling the following poem slithered into my journal through aching fingers.

 

HEADING SOUTH

By Kathleen Martens

June 7, 2016

 

Little pieces at a time

Seem to be heading south.

For me I suppose I’m fortunate

That it is not my mouth.

 

Because I have so much to say

As thoughts swirl in my head,

And this way I can speak what I write

And others can hear what I’ve said.

 

But my feet have long since gone

And thankfully surgery brought them home.

And my knee, reservations sought

But I pampered it to no longer roam.

 

And my elbow said farewell

And was gone for quite some time.

And after it returned to work

My shoulder wished to be supine.

 

Every morning when I wake

I seem to have a new flavor of pain.

It seems to roam from place to place

As if such gallivanting is only a game.

 

And as the years take their toll

I’ve learned to compensate.

And when my body parts take a vacation,

I would love to give in and luxuriate!

 

However life has its own demands

And I choose to work despite the pain.

I do not want to give up too soon

For too quickly I’d then wain.

 

I’d rather do what I can do,

Perhaps differently than I did before,

Because in living there is great satisfaction

And I anticipate the joy in store.

 

So, although my body complains

I’ll take care to pamper my health,

And learn new ways to handle the losses

Because enjoying life, is my true wealth.

 

God, thank You for an absolutely amazing body.

Thank You too for giving us the wisdom we need to take care of our health.

 

GOOD NIGHT AND MAY GOD BLESS YOU AND GIVE YOU HEALTH

 

Monday June 6 2016  I AM LEARNING

If you have read my blog very long you have heard me repeat often that “I AM LEARNING”.  And believe me that is so true.  I guess that is a good thing.  You might think that with me being this old I wouldn’t need to learn that much more.   But, for me at least, that is not the case.

I never thought it would be easy to downsize 43 years (plus pre-wed days) of hidden treasures.  It seems every box I open presents its own present, its own endowment to me, tied up in ribbons of sentiment. Between pictures, and dolls, and wall hangings, and our dead parent’s clothing, every box speaks loud and clear of times and places I haven’t thought about in years.  And so why do I keep these things?  I have asked that question over and over.

Well, today I was reading the book, “DOWNSIZING THE FAMILY HOME” by Marni Jameson and there were some very interesting insights as to different reasons we keep such unneeded keepsakes.  And we must ask ourselves what purpose does it have in our lives for the present time?  If you ask different people, you will get many different answers.  Once you figure out why you kept it, you allow your recently found treasure to fulfill that need and then separate from it by either, donating it, giving it away, selling it, or on the rare occasion, keeping it.  I asked my daughter-in-law how it was that she was able to part with almost everything.  I spoke about her answer a few days ago when I said you look at the item, release it, and then remember the people and events that created the memory.  Then you keep the memory of the fun time you had with the people, and not things.

This book reiterated that same premise.  So, I have begun asking myself, why am I keeping this?  And I think I found the answer.  I have kept so many things so that when I looked at them again I would remember the moment in time when I made the memory.  I wanted the thing to remind me of the good time I had with the people.  So now that I know why I kept all this stuff, I figure that opening the box and reliving that memory one more time, that “thing” had done what its purpose was to do and it could now be released.  It will have no meaning to future generations.  It was my memory, my good time.

Now my garage sale pile is growing larger more quickly.  Some of what I kept I am actually going back to reclaim it for the garage sale.  It is the memory I cherish, not the item. 

Except for my time constraint tonight I would share more explicit memories but I have had quite a long day and it is already getting close to my bed time.  I just thought you would like to know that I am making headway.  It is quite a journey and a great big money maker for a lot of enterprises.  As I read in the book, there are 8,000 people a day turning 65 until 2030.  That is a lot of old folks coming along all at once thanks to the end of World War II.  I am one of those early baby boomers.  So, as you can imagine, there is currently a lot of downsizing taking place. 

Dave and I have agreed to do our own downsizing so our children will not have to do it for us.  That will be our late-life gift to them instead of buying them any more gifts.  That way they will have less to downsize later.  See how thoughtful we are?  With our daughter turning 40, I realize all too soon they will need to do their own downsizing.  If I could do it over again I would not do the collecting or buying.  Every time you decide to buy something and take it to live at your house first think about what I just wrote!

 

THINK BEFORE YOU BUY

By Kathleen Martens

June 6, 2016

 

Think of all the money you save

When you don’t purchase the newest rave.

That little bauble on the shelf,

Is it really meant for self?

 

Think ahead about tomorrow

And all the headaches and the sorrows,

When someday you must compromise,

About what is to be downsized.

 

Just don’t bring unnecessary in,

Treat it as if it is a sin.

Instead, think about what you saved

And your wallet did not cave.

 

And when you purchase think ahead,

There is a shelf life, then it’s dead.

Perform its funeral harsh and sweet

As its cycle is complete.

 

And at the end of life’s road

You will have a much lighter load.

That will be your just reward,

Because JUNK you did not hoard!

 

Thank You God that You promised to meet our NEEDS.

Lord, thank You for opening my eyes to so much I still have to learn.

Thank You Lord for helping me release things.

Thank You God for your loving kindness over me.

Thank You too for my bed.

 

GOOD NIGHT ONE AND ALL.  GOD BLESS YOU!

Philippians 4:19

“And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of His glory in Christ Jesus”

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday Sabbath June 5 2016  A GLORIOUS DAY

 

SUNDAY SABBATH REPREIVE

By Kathleen Martens

June 5, 2016

 

Gentle breeze to caress the face.

Blue heavens to light the sky

As puffy white clouds

Languidly fly.

 

A beautiful day

Too good to miss,

So a short blog

Sent with a kiss.

 

I need to frolic

Like a young colt,

It doesn’t matter

I’m just an old dolt.

 

My spirit is young

And wants to live

And so the Sabbath

Offers hours to give.

 

Have a wonderful day

Wherever you are.

I hope it’s beautiful

Both near and far.

 

Off to the gardens

For a restful reprieve

No blog today

Will you receive.

 

Thank You God for such a beautiful and glorious day to worship and adore you.

Thank You for the Sunshine and rain.

Thank You for my vision that I can see the miraculous beauty of this day.

Thank You for summer flowers.

Thank You for bees.

 

MAY GOD BLESS EACH ONE OF YOU ON THIS BEAUTIFUL DAY

 

 

 

 

Saturday June 4 2016  THE BIRTHDAY MONTH

Today is my friend’s birthday as well as it is one of my sisters’.  Monday is another friend’s birthday.   Friday is my daughter’s birthday, and the day after that another very close friend’s birthday.  The next day is Dave’s sister’s birthday and then his birthday comes that same week.  The 30^th of June would have been Dave’s father’s 123rd birthday had he lived long enough.  He did live to see his 101^st birthday however.  Now he is celebrating with his Lord. 

The milestones of life, one of which is the day we celebrate our birth.  When I was a child birthdays were never an important event in our family.  My mom did try to see that we each had a birthday cake but the thought of a party was never even in the equation of life.  We were too poor, had too many kids, and mama was just too overworked keeping life and limb together during the years we lived in the projects.

However, I do remember one birthday party I had.  It was my eighth year.  I guess I probably just wore mama down.  She allowed me to make invitations and give them to some of my classmates.  Now there were two distinct classes of school kids, those who lived in the projects, and those who didn’t.  Because I chose to walk a very long circuitous route to school I could enter the school premises from the neighborhood of houses (which I thought was where the rich people lived), and not be distinguished as a “project kid”.  So that is what I did.  I just never mentioned where I lived.  My close friends knew I lived in the projects.  Most of my friends lived in the beautiful houses and were not allowed by their parents to venture into my home territory.  However, as I look back now I realize how kind they were to include me in their children’s birthday parties.  It seemed like all my friend’s parents liked me (or at least that was what I thought) and I was often asked to come over and play after school.  I found out quite quickly that my friends’ parents had some strict standards to abide by so for me, it was a positive learning tool.  One rule was that their children were not allowed to enter the projects, which was probably a very wise decision.

Back to my party.  I am still amazed when I look back and realize that the parents didn’t just send their kids over on foot (it was quite a maze to find the right apartment), but drove them over in a car.  Not only did they drive them, but a couple of them didn’t even leave the parking lot, which I could see from our small window on the second level of the building.  Knowing what I know now I would have probably carried out the same vigil.  But oh, was my party ever amazing!  There were probably six or eight other children present and I thought I was a princess.  It was the first time that I was the birthday girl.  It wasn’t fancy and we had no favors to pass out, but I do remember we played spin the tail on the donkey, with a real picture of a donkey!  And the one gift I remember receiving at my one and only birthday party was from Noreen Lakeman, the prettiest girl in the second grade class.  Her gift to me was a STORE BOUGHT SLIP!  It was silky, had little thin straps that could be adjusted and I thought I was in hog heaven.  I will never forget how it felt on my skin.  When I wore it (everyday) I just knew I was extra special and that everyone probably knew that I had on that beautiful slip.  I always wished the slip would show beneath my hem but by dresses were never short enough.  Dresses that others little girls wore were above their knees, mine would be mid-calf or longer and all home made.  Up until that 8th birthday my slips were all home sewn as well.  It was a wonderful birthday!  I made that slip last about two years.

And so, along the way birthdays became just another day with perhaps a remembrance of a cake and maybe a little gift of some sort, or not.  I made certain our children had small, age appropriate parties.  Few guests when they were younger, and more guest as they grew older.  We never really did much for Dave and me.  I did throw a huge surprise birthday party for Dave’s 40^th birthday, however I purposely gave it to him on his 39^th birthday to catch him off guard.  And, he was totally caught off guard because it was so out of the ordinary.  Our tried and true friends were all present, some from miles and miles away.  They simply stayed over night with us.  It was a big deal!  And it was fun.

Fast forward another 20 years or so and by that time I had almost totally forgotten to celebrate birthdays.  I never understood the celebration of life that a party commemorates.  When I was 8 years old it was all about the gifts.  And then I met a new friend.  We weren’t really very close at that time.  She is also a neighbor who lives through the woods.  Every birthday for several years I would a find a birthday gift magically appear on my door knob.  After we because closer I asked her why she remembered my birthday.  She told me something which was profound to me.  She said, “All of your birthdays should be celebrated to commemorate the fact that you were born.”  That was a startling discovery for me.  About that same time another very dear friend sent me a card that took my breath away.  I still have it but cannot remember verbatim the words on the card, but it went something like this on the front:  “Today celebrates an important event…” and when the card was opened it continued, “Because it was the day you were born and the world is a better place because of your birth”. 

That card, plus what my other friend told me, gave me a new way of looking at myself in relationship to my birthdays.  I realized I was of value because it was God who created me.  And he created me uniquely and with a purpose.  I now think of a person’s birth date as something very significant.  And actually it is.  Our days are numbered, and we do have a purpose.  I have learned to celebrate life every day, not just on my birthday.  And I want others to know that I honor the commemoration of their birth.

So enough about the birthday month.  (Except for the rest of the blog.)

 

YOUR BIRTH IS A GIFT OF LOVE

By Kathleen Martens

June 4, 2016

 

To give birth is quite a task,

If it is the mom you ask.

And so special to recall the joy

Regardless whether girl or boy.

 

Each child created uniquely by God,

With days numbered upon this sod.

From dust we were created.

And back to dust we are fated.

 

But in between God has a plan

For each child, each woman, each man.

God has a calling upon each soul

That should be our life long goal.

 

And because of that I do believe

Our special day should make one sing.

Our birthday comes but once a year

So mark the calendar as it nears.

 

And thank God daily, that in you He breathed

And planned a way you’d be ever free.

Realize your birth is a gift of love

From our precious Father up above.

 

Thank You God that You gave me the opportunity to be born that I might know You.

Thank You God for being such an awesome Creator.

Thank You Lord for the two precious lives you entrusted to Dave and me.

Thank You also for the birth of our two wonderful grandsons.

What an amazing Father You are.

Thank You God that I am in the palm of Your hand as I travel from dust to dust.

Thank You God for friends that changed my life by the beautiful words they said to me.

Thank You that I now know how to celebrate the beautiful gift of life You gave to me.

 

“Psalm 139:13-18

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.
¹⁶ Your eyes saw my unformed body;
    all the days ordained for me were written in your book
    before one of them came to be.
¹⁷ How precious to me are your thoughts, God!
    How vast is the sum of them!
¹⁸ Were I to count them,
    they would outnumber the grains of sand—
    when I awake, I am still with you.”

GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS YOU ON THIS WONDERFUL DAY!

P.S.  And now every year I throw myself a birthday party and celebrate with God and my family!  Now it is about the gracious gift of life that God has given me.

 

 

 

Friday June 3 2016  THE BIG FOUR ZERO

Quickly approaching is our daughter’s 40^th birthday.  The big 4—0.  As I look back and remember my approaching 40^th birthday I felt ancient.  For some reason I really did feel that way.  My 40’s were difficult years due to my intense work and my poor health.  Some of my maladies were actually from health situations I inherited, but most were due to my lifestyle.  I lived on caffeine, ate foods that were not healthy for me, loved chocolate and in one year gained 50 pounds.  I had what I believed to be one of the most demanding jobs possible.  The responsibility of my position was astronomical to me and I took it very seriously.  I was a day care provider who watched infants.  My employee and I would have a new batch of newborns and nurtured them until they were two years old.  Then we began with a new set of eight tiny precious babies.  It was back breaking, stressful, long hours, and under-appreciated by some of the parents, (others thought we were like magic) as we “graduated” happy and well-adjusted toddlers. 

It was a very serious position and I was always on alert.  I could tell endless stories of the good, the bad, and the smelly!  I think I may have even cared for a few of the “ugly” but I was never convinced after falling in love with each one.  As much as I loved them, I was never so happy to finally close my doors and step into the world of photography.  I began studying and learning photography long before I embarked on opening my own studio.  I never regretted beginning a new career when I was 50 years old.

And now my daughter is catching up to where I was.  She has a lot more going for her than I did at her age.  She belies her age in looks, has the body any twenty year old would covet, she has a wonderful husband (just as I had one too), two dogs, and no kids!  She too is on a new adventure in life training to become a general manager of an upscale restaurant.  Her job will probably be stressful, working long hours, and at times back breaking work.  She is currently training in Philadelphia but a problem has already cropped up.  The restaurant owner, who also owns the new restaurant opening in Florida, which our daughter will be managing, told her that several of his good employees in Philadelphia want to transfer to Florida so they can work for our daughter.  So, I guess that is a good thing.

As I sit back and think of the past 40 years it seems amazing that so much time has passed, and so quickly.  It has been an awesome experience to see the beautiful little baby girl we brought home from the hospital grow and mature into the beautiful woman she is today.  It has been interesting to see how she blossomed as an adult through her own self-discovery as the years accumulated.  Somehow she has always seemed to be older and wiser than her years.  It may have seemed more so to me because I never ever felt wise or grown up.  When I turned 55 years old I asked myself the question, am I now really grown up?  To be truthful, I don’t know if I am even yet.  And so I ask myself the question, how could I feel old at 40 and not even feel grown up.  Perhaps if I had felt grown up at 40 I might not have felt like I was so old.  If that is the case, then I now feel grown up, because I no longer feel old!  I am just the same me as I was when I was born, with lots of experiences, between then and now. 

This morning I was pondering the question “Who Am I”

 

This is how I noodled through it.

 

WHO AM I? 

By Kathleen Martens

June 3 2016

 

Am I the sum total of all my years?

The lost little girl who cried many tears?

A result of the adolescent years I had

When I felt like I wanted to kill my dad?

The one with young heartache giving up my love

Crying out desperately to God above?

 

Am I the young bride with the man of my dreams,

Forty three years passed, but yesterday it seems?

Am I the young woman caressing her babe

Who fulfilled my desire as a mother she made?

Am I the housewife going to work each day,

Worn out and overworked in life’s busy fray?

 

Am I the caretaker for the children of others,

Less time to be with my daughter and her brother?

Am I the passion that fueled my soul

Capturing memories to treasure, my photographer’s goal?

Am I now just simply old, no title, but free,

Retired and happy, so I can be just me?

 

So who am I and why was I born?

What purpose have I now older and worn?

And so I ask God what answer has He?

For just what reason did He create me?

And deep in my soul he spoke to my heart.

I was born for eternity so we would never part.

 

He told me I was the daughter of The King

And that our mutual love much joy would bring.

That I have a mission which before me stands,

To share His love with each woman, each man.

That my words will speak long after I’m gone,

So others will experience a bright new dawn.

 

He instructed me to comfort and always speak kind

So that God’s Word many would find.

To live simply with grace, and be a shining light

To help others survive their darkest nights.

And to reach out and touch and offer prayers,

So those who are hurting know someone else cares.

 

With intentional purpose I must run my race,

And with integrity intact help others to face

All the questions and doubts that nag at their heart,

So when they meet God they need not depart.

But the greatest answer God helped me to see

Was that He created me, to be me.

 

Born as a sinner to receive His grace

So that I one day will behold His face.

And though the world full of chaos and so wild,

His answer to me:  “YOU ARE MY CHILD”.

And so now I know exactly who I am.

I am a co-heir with Christ, I’m God’s precious lamb.

 

Thank You God that I was born a child of man, saved by grace, transformed into the Child of God, created that my words would be a beacon to the lost and hurting, that others too would have the opportunity to become sons and daughters of the King of kings.

 

GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS EACH OF YOU!

 

P.S.  I emailed Rebecca this afternoon, along with a copy of today’s yet unpublished blog, and asked her if I could use this information in today’s publication.  I do not write things about others without first asking permission to do so.  Below is Rebecca’s response.  I thought I would include it so you can see why she touches my heart so.

“Hi Mom

Your blog is great. You forgot to mention that no matter how old your daughter gets she always needs her parents though and feels so blessed that she has them!! I love you both so very much!!! I’m so happy to read that and know you are in such a better place now than then. I am so proud of all you have done to get there and all that you continue to do to stay there. I love you Momma Bear!!! Xoxox”

 

Thursday June 2 2016   WEEDS!  WEEDS!  WEEDS!

The end of a long busy day.  As I walked down to my office to write my blog I noticed Dave was outside resting in his favorite chair on the patio.  If I can’t find Dave in the house I can usually locate him someplace in the yard.  He loves the yard.  He works so diligently to keep the yard looking beautiful.  He goes way and beyond what I could ever think of doing outside.  Over the years we have planted hundreds of plants to outline our lawn area and walkways from the ever encroaching woods.  Dave’s mission in life seems to be keeping the woods at bay.  It is a never ending job.  Especially when you acquire an invasive species like we did a few years ago.

I went out to join Dave in the cool of the evening so as to enjoy his company as well our backyard in pre-mosquito season.  We are so blessed to see what we see when we look outside.   I told Dave I didn’t have a blog topic, he looked out at the yard and said, “WEEDS, WEEDS, WEEDS!  That’s your topic.”  Between mowing, weed whacking, blowing off the debris of our ever shedding trees, he has been pulling weeds out by the roots.  More than two acres of wooded land is quite a large yard to keep up.

I sat down on the patio chair for a few moments before I spied weeds that were calling my name.  So I ended up weeding.  I pull out the easy ones that come up by the root.  We have had wonderful night rains this past week so the ground is soft and pliable.  When we go too many days between rains the ground becomes like hard rock.  Dave has taken advantage of the soft loamy soil these past few days to dig out as many of the weeds as possible.  He is doing a good job but he says it is a never ending battle with the two invasive species that we have.  Most people might surmise that all the forest is weeds, but that is truly not the case.  What grows in the woods would be considered weeds if they were growing in your perennial or annual gardens, but when native to this climate and habitat, they are not considered weeds when growing in the wild.

Tonight I included two photos that I took from my patio chair.  Photos can never truly depict the fragrance, serenity, beauty, and the melody of the woods.  I snapped a couple of shots on Dave’s Iphone to show you my bird’s eye view.

Not only do we have weeds growing in the yard, I feel as if we have weeds growing inside the house too.  All the stuff I keep bringing out from rooms and closets and drawers look like new weeds cropping up.  When I look at my once neat, and proper studio, I see piles and piles of new growth accumulating each day.  So, I plan to attack the inside like Dave is attacking the outside.  Constant and never giving up.    

 

WEEDS!  WEEDS!  WEEDS!

By Kathleen Martens

June 2, 2016

 

How many weeds

In one little seed?

 

One weed grows

And nobody knows.

 

Just one flower

Has lots of power.

 

For each bloom

Has increasing zoom.

 

One seed, one plant

With quite a slant.

 

One blossom creates pods

Hundreds on each rod.

 

Multiply one flower head

Which, when finally dead,

 

Impregnates the soil

So Dave has to toil.

 

It all started with just one

And now it is not fun.

 

So now the hundreds

Create conundrums,

 

Hours of toil

Digging roots from soil.

 

Oh well, after all is said

Someday too we will be dead.

 

Oh Adam and Eve

What was up your sleeve?

 

We all suffer pain

And the world is maimed.

 

God, thank You for all You provide on this earth through seeds.

Thank You Lord that when I walk into a grocery store there is food on the shelves.

Thank You too for the provisions we have so we can buy food to eat.

Thank You for sunshine.

Thank You for rain.

Thank You for quiet evenings like tonight so I could enjoy just being in your beautiful creation.

Thank You for turnips.

 

A LATE GOODNIGHT TO YOU.  MAY GOD RICHLY BLESS YOUR NIGHT AND TOMORROW.

 

 

 

 

Wednesday June 1 2016  GETTING RID OF “THINGS” AND THE JOY IT BRINGS

It is only 10:17 a.m. and I already have a topic for my blog.  Usually I come to the computer without a topic but my prayer time with the Lord set me on course today.  As my title indicates, it is again about getting rid of things.  If I bore you to tears on this topic just realize it too will end because eventually I will someday run out of things of which to discard.

What I have discovered is that each person’s dreams of a “simpler life” is different. For some, it may be to the extreme of living off the grid, to another downsizing the size of their home or moving into a condominium or apartment.  To others simplifying may mean staying right where they are and eliminating clutter of the unnecessary.  And to someone else it may just mean not doing, going, or being involved with so many outside endeavors.  And there will probably always be those who choose to live simpler by not doing anything at all differently than what they do already.

For me I have discovered that creating simplicity will take some effort.  So, I am choosing to do today what I would rather not have to do, so that in the future I can do what I would rather do.  And that something that I must do is disposing of all that is unnecessary for the life I want to carve out of the years I have left.  I have given deep soul searching as to what is important for me to accomplish before my race is complete.  As I spoke about recently, my desire is to leave a legacy behind me that will continue to bless others after I am gone. My legacy will not be riches or fame, but I hope the words I leave behind will comfort and inspire those who read them.  Daily I am working on my writing and I hope to publish some of my devotionals and poetry. I do this even as I go about the business of downsizing.  I find that it is all the little steps that lead to the finish line.

I believe that God is calling me forward to finish what I have begun.  I have books to compile and edit, I have accumulated bounty that must be sold or given away, I have two family photo albums to complete for my sister, and then all the photo work I would like to finish for my immediate family.  I have lives to minister to, people to comfort, many prayers to pray, and I desire to spend in quiet time with God.  It may sound like a lot but I will just take one day at a time and allow God to bring the people into my life that He chooses.  He always has a miraculous way of bringing people into my life, to both help and guide me, as well as those whose lives I can touch.

My focus must be on today in order to obtain my goal of simplifying.  Here is an excerpt from today’s journaling of what I believe the Lord was impressing upon my heart: “Stay focused on this day.  You are working for a goal and it will come in due time.  Be diligent with what must be done this day, this hour.  It is not to be looked at as a punishment of acquisition, but rather an eye opening experience that will teach you where to place your value.” 

Following is the poem that came after I finished my journal entry.

 

MORE TIME TO SPEND WITH FRIENDS

By Kathleen Martens

June 1, 2016  

 

What we own is but temporal lot

When all you want is more, more, more.

Things will eventually get the upper hand

And your spirit will cease to soar.

 

Look around and count the cost

At the hours of labor you’ve worked

So you could add just one more thing,

Which after a time you simply shirk.

 

As the mess grows higher and higher

And spreads in all directions,

You are no longer master of what you own

And for your stuff you lose affection.

 

But to get rid, just how is it done

With so many memories wrapped in things?

Touch it once and give it away,

Let people be the joy memory brings.

 

Think about what is really important

In the course of all you do.

Is it the things that you collect?

Or family and friends that come through?

 

Take a picture and let things go,

Tuck shared memories deep in your heart.

And when all the stuff is gone,

Memories of togetherness will not depart.

 

And your soul will feel much lighter,

Your purpose and goals will surface again.

You’ll have more time to leave your legacy

And more time to spend with friends.

 

My scripture for today:  Psalms 19:12-14

¹² But who can discern their own errors?
    Forgive my hidden faults.
¹³ Keep your servant also from willful sins;
    may they not rule over me.
Then I will be blameless,
    innocent of great transgression.

¹⁴ May these words of my mouth and this meditation of my heart
    be pleasing in your sight,
    Lord, my Rock and my Redeemer.

 

Have a wonderful day today discovering the simpler life that most suits you.

 

GOD BLESS YOU!

 

Tuesday May 31 2016  A DIFFERENT KIND OF DAY

As I sit writing these words I am in a private pre-op room and my youngest grandson has just been wheeled away to go into surgery.  Mom was by his side.  Xander is having his adenoids removed and new tubes placed in his eardrums.  Courtland is on a previously planned field trip with the oldest son and did not want to disappointment him by cancelling, so I joined in to be with our daughter in law during the waiting vigil.  Not a serious or long surgery by any means but just knowing your child is going under the knife and anesthesia is enough to be concerned about.  Amy just returned and the clock is ticking as we wait to be called into the recovery room.  We sit side by side, both working on our laptops, making the most of this next hour.  A bit of a different kind of day, but hey, if you have your computer with you, no time is lost.

I am still practicing the “simpler life” and trying not to jam too much into one day but sometimes days like today just happen.  It was only brought to my attention on Sunday that Amy would be waiting alone and I asked if I could be her support system for these few hours.  I was happy that she said yes as I know I would not want to do it alone.  However, I also have a long-standing hair appointment today that I must go to.  I probably will not be here when the little guy comes out of his anesthesia but at least Amy was not alone for the entire day.

So, to make my life simper today I decided to write my blog while here in order to kill two birds with one stone, so to speak.  And now we have been told that he is out of surgery and everything went well.  We will be going back quite soon to see him in recovery so I will need to finish this later.

LATER

I was able to stay long enough to spend a few moments with him in recovery and give him a kiss, then had to leave to arrive at the barber shop on time.  Yes, I go to a barber!

My hair is cut, I’ve had dinner, and now I am back.  As it is getting late I will write a poem and bid my farewell.

 

AN UNPLANNED DAY

By Kathleen Martens

May 31, 2016

 

When I have days not planned

Less of me they seem to demand.

I go with the flow and role with the punches,

And ad-lib with my best hunches.

 

And somehow the day works out fine,

And seems to be less confined.

I’ve no expectations to live up to,

So I never mind having a few.

 

And so it was this fine day

I had the chance to color and play.

Being with those I love is never a chore,

And even the four year old is never a bore.

 

And it’s always nice to be needed

For whatever it is that needs heeded.

For often it just takes giving time,

To allow someone else to feel sublime.

 

And really it was me who came out on top,

As I gave all the kisses which I brought.

And I received love from my little grandson,

On this unplanned day it was me who won!

 

HAVE A WONDERFUL EVENING.  GOOD NIGHT AND GOD BLESS YOU!

 

 

 

 

 

Monday May 30 2016  THE SIMPLER LIFE

The synonyms of EXPERIMENT are:  “trial, test, research, experimentation, testing, and try out”.  So that is what I am planning to do.  I am going to “try out” a new way of life for me.  It will be somewhat of an experimentation with a way of life that I have longed for in the past.  I’ve experimented with it but could never get it to stick for long due to extenuating circumstances.  Well, those circumstances are not a hindrance any longer, so perhaps now is the time to try it out again.  My motivation may be that I want to do it on my terms and not wait until it is thrust upon me because I have no other choice.

My desire is to simplify my life.  Dave is on board with this also.  I also believe I am being prompted by God to do so.  When I first began sorting I was a bit hesitant about what to part with.  For some reason it is becoming easier as the days and weeks fly by.  I have asked God to prepare my heart and help me and it seems that is happening.  Prior to this time in my life my biggest threat to the simpler life was the fact that I needed to work.  Now that period of my life is over (forever I hope) and I must again look forward and project where I want to be next year, as well as in five years and beyond.  “Younger” would be my first hope, but since that is not about to happen I must prepare for my future.  And both Dave and I want our future to be less encumbered by what we have collected throughout our past.  And we both have the goal to slow down, living life in the slower lane so to speak. 

And so today I started by taking it a bit easier on this Memorial Day.  Yesterday I wrote about my reflections on what Memorial Day signifies to me.  Today I thanked God again for our brave men and women throughout the years and thanked God for the privilege of living in a free country.   I try to never take that for granted.

I was awake quite early and Dave wanted to sleep longer so I slipped outside in my house robe to enjoy the early morning crispness.  We live on a quiet cul de sac with only three other houses so we don’t have much traffic, especially not early in the morning.  I can’t tell you how refreshing it was to step outside after a night rain and just inhale the aroma from the fragrant damp earth.  I wish I had my IPhone with me so I could have taken some photos.  The lighting was so beautiful. 

My first inclination was to go back into the house and start working or go to the gym to work out.  I couldn’t pull myself away from the calming effect of such an awesome morning.  I brought my fresh peach and strawberry breakfast outside and munched on my fruit and boiled egg over the next hour.  During that time I fertilized all my recently planted pots, pulled several hidden patches of weeds, walked the perimeter of our home, and then ended my quiet interlude by pulling up more weeds by the roots.  The rain softened earth was perfect for weeding.  I especially wanted to annihilate  the weeds that were blooming that would soon spill their seeds.  We can get two or three crops of weeds each summer if we are not diligent to tackle them before they go to seed.  When you live in the woods weeds are king!  The woods thinks the weeds are just part of the family, but we soon find out that they can overtake a perennial garden all too quickly if left unabated.  “The Simpler Life” might someday mean moving to a different location.  The Lord will prepare us when that time comes.

I finally came back inside and decided to spend some time with the Lord and do my journaling.  My first written words were “Awesome Day!”  And I felt the Lord prompting me that that was the title of my poem.  And so it was.  This is what I received.

 

AWESOME DAY!

By Kathleen Martens

May 30, 2016

 

Summer rain through the night,

Fresh new earth in the light.

Glistening droplets cling to grass

Like gleaming shards of colored glass.

 

Cool and wet the fragrance lifts,

Offering rich, and abundant gifts.

In ecstasy of morning sun,

In lightening shadows the Fairies run.

 

With morning’s glory darkness erased

Highlighting raindrops in delicate lace

Clinging to a spider’s web,

Becoming more vibrant as darkness ebbed.

 

My world is birthed in brilliant wonder

From midnight downpour with sound of thunder.

The earth drinks greedily last night’s rain,

To offer beauty, its goal and aim.

 

The splendor of the flowers that grow,

And all the crops the farmers sow,

And thirsty trees thankfully drink,

As dancing leaves like glitter wink.

 

The birds are singing, delighted with worms

That crawl upward, and from soil squirm.

Energetic squirrels delight in frolic

In grassy areas so bucolic.

 

The world awakens as if in praise,

For the spectacular gift, of such an AWESOME DAY!

 

Thank You God for creating a new day.

Thank You Lord for the gift of life.

Thank You Father for the two butterflies I saw today.

Thank You Lord for your protection over our children and grandchildren and grand-dogs.

Thank You Lord for who You are.

 

GOD BLESS YOU ON THIS AWESOME MEMORIAL DAY.