Monthly Archives: December 2015
Tuesday December 22 2015 MY FAVORITE KIND OF SHOPPING SPREE
Tuesday December 22 2015 MY FAVORITE KIND OF SHOPPING SPREE
Well, things went a little differently today than I had expected. Dave and I accomplished some shopping for someone else but I didn’t have the time to finish my last Christmas project as I had expected (and planned) to do. But, tomorrow is another day! It will be first on my agenda. I can’t say what it is because it too is a surprise.
So, I am home now. But oh, was my afternoon wonderful. A couple of days ago I was going through my purse and found a gift card for $50 that my husband had given me about four years ago as a Christmas gift for the Barnes and Noble Store. I purposely looked for my gift card after he told me that Barnes and Noble is struggling in the market place due to all the E-Books. I started wondering if the local store would be closing and then I wouldn’t have a chance to use my gift. AND I CERTAINLY DIDN’T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN! I asked Dave if he would go shopping with me after we finished the shopping venture for the mysterious person mentioned above. He said yes.
Normally, my husband is about the most patient husband in the world. He waits at church until after I am through talking and ministering to others. He is so patient with me getting ready to go places for which there is no mandatory arrival time. He normally doesn’t rush me at all EXCEPT for two circumstances. One, he does not like to be late anywhere (but especially to church), and two, HE DOES NOT LIKE TO SHOP (or at least shop with me). Well, today he gave me the greatest gift ever. We went to Barnes and Nobles, he told me to go and have a good time shopping, and he would just be doing his own thing. So that is what we did. We only met once when he told me he found the books I was looking for and pointed me to the shelf where they were housed. He went on his way and never once suggested it was time to leave or asked if I was finished, or…just fill in the blanks. Nope. He sat at a table overlooking the store and just watched what was going on. Finally I spotted him, brought all my titles up so he could see them, showed him the art supplies I wanted and discussed what I would buy with my gift certificate. Well, the art supplies were $40 so I decided I wouldn’t get them because I wanted the books more. I ended up with five used books, all non-fiction and two new books also non-fiction. I did find some fiction I liked so I looked them up on my iPhone to see if the library had them. I ordered them from the library rather than purchasing them. Very rarely do I ever buy fiction books, especially if I can check them out for free from the library. I suppose that also cuts into the bottom line dollar of the store.
After I picked out my selection of books Dave included the art supplies and said they were a Christmas present from him. I have lived 42 years with this wonderful man and I believe I am the most fortunate wife in the world. Not because he gives me “THINGS”, but because he has truly given his heart to me. I have never known anyone as sweet and gentle as the man that God picked out for me.
The highlight of my findings today was a book by A.W. Tozer published originally in 1981 and re-released in 2015. Tozer died in 1963. He was such a prolific writer that most of his books were published after his death and are still being compiled with new titles being released. The one I purchased today is “EVENINGS WITH TOZER, DAILY DEVOTIONAL READINGS”, compiled by Gerald B. Smith. Just think, one new page every day from one of my favorite authors who has been dead for over 50 years. His books are still just as pertinent today as they would have been 50 years ago or even 50 years into the future. What he wrote about is timeless. I consider this book like a desert. A little bit of something rich for every single day of next year which will satisfy my body, soul, and intellect. I am looking forward to it with such anticipation. But I shan’t read ahead! I relish the fact that I will enjoy a bit of it each day! Just in case you don’t know it, or understand why I speak of books the way I do, to me they are like delectable treats to be savored slowly and with great pleasure, like a fine piece of chocolate. Oh how sad that I can no longer partake of chocolate, but oh what joy that books are still on my diet, and I can devour all that I desire. They are food for thought. And I do enjoy thinking!
Before we left the store I asked Dave if he wanted to buy a book. Dave just never spends any money on himself (he sounds like a saint doesn’t he ladies) and after thinking about if for amount 3 seconds he said yes, he wanted to buy the book I put back. I looked at him suspiciously and questioned whether or not he was buying it for me because he knew I had wanted it. No, he told me, he really did want to read it himself. He went back in line and purchased the book for himself. The first thing he did when we arrived home was to quickly take it out of the bag and squirrel it away in his safe zone. He knew if he left it in the bag he would probably never see it again. The title he chose was, “VOICE OF A PROPHET, WHO SPEAKS FOR GOD?” by A.W. Tozer, compiled and edited by James L. Snyder, published in 2014. Hmmm…do you think I might read that one too? Can’t wait!
THE PERFECT BOOK
By Kathleen Martens
December 22, 2015
Words, words, and more words
Written in the pages of books.
How do you pick the right one?
By its thickness or how it looks?
Or is it by how it feels
When you hold it in your hand?
Or is it the title
That gives the command?
How do I choose
A book that delights,
That will give great pleasure
Night after night?
How do I know
That the words are true
And will penetrate my heart
With thoughts that are new?
Do I search forever,
Or is it easy to find
The perfect book,
Just the right kind?
For me there is something
That just grabs my heart
And tells me quietly
Here is the book to start!
And I also confess
I don’t want a dozer.
And I know it won’t be…
If the author is Tozer.
I guess you can tell I enjoy reading Tozer.
The howling wind outside the blackness of my windows is making such sounds as I have never heard. We have huge leafless trees surrounding our house and I think they must be praising God very loudly right now. The racket is unbelievable and it comes in through the thick walls of our brick home. I actually thought I heard a crowd of people making noise outside and then I realized it was all the branches knocking their limbs together. Sometimes it is a bit scary. Those trees could do a lot of damage if one came crashing down on the roof. I pray to God for protection!
And I wish you a Merry Christmas. Tomorrow is the eve of Christmas Eve! Enjoy this year, there may never be another one like it!
Monday December 21 2015 AND TIME GOES BY
Monday December 21 2015 AND TIME GOES BY
Photos from yesterday were picked up today. That is good. Shopping for Christmas Dinner is done. That is good. My sum total on my list was to pick up a rutabaga for the root vegetable bake I must bring to the dinner. Of Course that rutabaga only cost $40.00 plus. And then we needed to stop by Costo for 4 flats of bottled water and two roasted chickens. Those only cost $80.44 cents. If you are like me, you can’t walk through a grocery store without remember everything else you need (or think you need) to buy.
The chicken is deboned, the bones are boiling and the bottles of water are still in the car. This was Dave’s first lifting day since his surgery over eight weeks ago. I told him to wait until tomorrow to do any more lifting. Those flats weigh over 40 pounds each and must be carried quite a ways to their indoor parking place.
A few presents to wrap and our Christmas is ready. That is tomorrow’s duty.
So…has this blog been short enough? There’s lots more I could write but must leave in one hour for our Monday night movie. Oh yes, I will say that I found out my deceased brother’s middle name, the one my mom couldn’t remember. My older sister remembered it and emailed it to me. It was Marion. Wilfred Marion. I wish we had thought to ask my sister while my mom was still concerned about it. Thanks sis!
AND TIME GOES BY
By Kathleen Martens
December 21, 2015
Time goes by and some thoughts leave.
Where they go I’ll never know.
Loss of memory such a grief
Until hunting you no longer go.
It’s as if the brain begins crumbling
We become forgetful over our loss,
As if our thoughts begin mumbling,
Pulling to surface our ancient dross.
Thoughts of yesteryear seem to swim
Bringing memories of bygone days.
What happened five minutes ago become dim
As we become forgetful in our ways.
It’s sort of like losing yourself,
Wondering who you are.
Your present identity sits on a shelf,
And you are fearful of wandering far.
And the parent becomes the child
Self-absorbed with years of recollection.
All those memories no longer filed
Leaving one without direction.
Will it be me? I can’t help ask.
Will I be the one who is lost?
Leaving my care to another’s task,
Unaware of the toil and cost?
In this plight which position is worse?
The one who is now the parent?
Or is it the child who was born first?
To whom nothing is now apparent?
I was thinking of my mother as I wrote this poem. Her last few years were lost to her. When we cleaned out her living quarters after she died we found a page torn from her journal, hidden in the drawer of little table in the entrance way. One of the sentences she had written was, “This is Sybil…or at least I think it is Sybil. I don’t really know who I am. I think I have lost myself, but I have a daughter and she will help find me…” She went on to write much more but I do not have the torn page with me right now and cannot remember the precise words. It was written at the beginning of her years of dementia. It was such a sad place for her to be. Living so far away there was not a lot I could help out with, but I have two sisters who lived with her and faithfully cared for her until her death in 2010. It was very difficult and exhausting for my sisters. How grateful I am to them for giving her round the clock care like they did. I believe she was happy in her own way, in her own little world.
Why did I think of my mom now? I do not know. But I write what is going on inside and that was what surfaced. I guess that was the poem I was supposed to write tonight. A lot more to the story but this is all I will comment on this evening. I am not sad for my mother now. She is spending Christmas with Jesus this year. How awesome is that! Besides, she has lots of family with her now, brothers and sisters and mom and dad, cousins, her grandparents and great grandparents, and a baby son. And I bet they don’t even have to do the cooking. Merry Christmas up there in heaven mama. I still miss you but I wouldn’t want you to come back to this world for anything!
And I wish all of my friends down here on earth a wonderful and Merry Christmas, even if I don’t know you!
MERRY CHRISTMAS
Sunday Sabbath December 20 2015 A MOTHER’S LOVE
Sunday Sabbath December 20 2015 A MOTHER’S LOVE
Well, my day happened. Like I said yesterday, I cannot speak out loud of having something finished because then there is always something that comes along to take up that time. Well, I was right. It happened today. Dave drives to church on Sunday mornings so I go through my iPhone emails and dump about a hundred or more on the way to service. Then before we arrive at church I shut my phone down so it will not ring during the service. So I did that this morning. Later while the pastor was preaching something told me my phone was going to ring but I thought naw…it is turned off. And just as the service was ending and the pastor getting into the quite stage talking about salvation and prayer time, my phone does ring, very loudly. I immediately grabbed it out of my bag and turned it off but not before I saw on the screen that is was from one of the hospitals of which I am on call. When a baby dies I am called to take photos for the family if they would like me to come.
First of all, I couldn’t believe my phone rang and when I saw who it was I thought, well, I guess I was supposed to get that call. I left service, went to the hallway and returned the call. Yes, I was needed as soon as possible. I knew that I was supposed to go because otherwise why would my phone ring when I had purposely turned it off? Dave and I left at the first amen out a side door and bypassed a lot of people traffic and parking lot back up. I was at the hospital a little over an hour later. The call came at 10:00 a.m., I was at the hospital by 11:15 a.m. and finished at approximately 12:50 p.m.. Came home, ate lunch and burrowed myself in the post production work from the mornings session and came back upstairs at about 7:45 p.m.. So there went my day.
Sometimes it is unbearable to my heart to see the sorrow and sadness and shock that the grieving parents display. This death was so unexpected and blindsided the family. At times it is all I can do to keep my composure. I will admit, sometimes I cry. Here it is Christmas time and the sorrow of their loss may very well haunt them each Christmas season for the rest of their lives. God gives me strength to do what I do, otherwise I could not bear it. I was told that they would be having a funeral and the DVD I make is usually shown at the service. It is done. That is a good feeling.
Often I wake up in the morning somehow knowing I will be called in to the hospital to do a photo session. When that happens I even change certain things around in my day perchance the call comes I will be ready. Sometimes I mention it to Dave and almost every time it has come to pass. I had an inkling knowing I would receive a call during church. My thought was that, that “knowledge” that came to me was so I would remember to turn my phone back on and check my messages. I guess that was not good enough. I needed to go immediately. Now I am spent. Literally, SPENT. I looked up the word “spent” and there was a list of definitions so long that it is no wonder I feel like I do. Here are a few of the synonyms: “consumed, expended, used up, finished, overdone, completed, at an end, exhausted, tired, useless, depleted, worn out, washed up, bushed, whacked, and run through! Whew! It makes me tired just reading the list of how SPENT I AM!
A MOTHER’S LOVE
By Kathleen Martens
December 20, 2015
A mother’s love
Born in child
Sweet and simple
Strong yet mild.
A dear little life
Meant to live
But died too soon
No breath to give.
Grief overwhelming
Within a soul
A babe in arms
Her hopeful goal.
But not to be
For death has come
For her sweet
Little one.
I hope my poem is not too melancholy. I usually write some sort of poem after I deal with a family who has had a loss. It is the way my heart expresses itself and it helps me cope. No matter what the poems say, they are all quite sad.
Uh Oh! More poem is coming:
(continued from above poem)
The angels came and beckoned,
“Little one come home.
It is not your lot in life,
This old earth to roam.
There is a place made for you
And a Father who calls your name.
Your days upon the earth
Wil not harbor fame.
There is a reason you were born
And though you may never know,
The lessons learned because of you
To others it will show.
The road is not always easy
To those left behind
But the purpose of your life
Others will certainly find.
One thing you should know
A mother’s love is forever,
Part of you tucked inside.
In her heart forever tethered.
I consider the above just one poem with a few of my thoughts inserted in between. I actually thought I was finished when I started sharing my thoughts.
A short little story comes to mind. Years before I was born my mother gave birth to her second son. From what I understood her baby boy was born about two months early, in the outback of Arkansas. Home grown midwives prevailed and there were really no hospitals accessible. There was also no way to get there even if one was accessible. Also, there was no money to pay for a doctor. Well, little Wilfred was born at home. I think he lived a short while and then died. Many years later I was on a trip to southern Arkansas with my mother and she wanted me to go a certain way so she could show me where my brother was buried. Where we drove was just desolate. There were no structures around for miles, no houses or towns. I can’t imagine what it must have been like in the 1930’s. We finally come to a corner of sorts with a barbed wire fence separating the road from the pasture. I could see where there might have been an old cemetery but it was very rundown and I could not make out any headstones. As we drove very slowly past a stretch of fence, she had me pull over and stop. She studied the landscape a bit and pointed to a couple of old posts that looked like they were going to fall down. She then told me that he was buried by one of the posts right in that area. The ground was overgrown, weeds grew higher than my knees (or maybe it was grazing fodder) and I couldn’t differentiate one post from another. She turned to me and said, “Your heart never stops grieving when you bury a child and I can’t even remember his middle name.” Not remembering his middle name really disturbed her.
My mother only gave birth to two sons. She went on later to have five daughters. At the time we visited the grave area of Wilfred she had already buried her oldest son. He lived to be 46 years old. The words she said in the car on the way to his funeral haunted me even more than the words she told me at Wilfred’s graveside. My brother’s death was very tragic. My mother was distraught. She turned to her daughters in the car and said “How sad it is to know that the world is a better place without your son living in it.” Is it possible for a mother’s heart to know more pain than knowing that?
I hope I don’t open a can of worms with my family when I share these little stories, but they are true as to how I remember them. Sometimes certain things just cause me to think about other certain things and the one way I deal with them is to write them out. I am sad that my mother had to suffer the heartache that she suffered but I do not carry the pain with me. God has taken that pain from me, but I was not the mother. Who can know a mothers love? Who can know a mother’s pain?
If your mother is still living and you haven’t told her you love her in a while, do so now. Do not wait for that one day in May when you MIGHT REMEMBER to send her card. Let her know you love her now. And moms, if you have kids out there, especially grown ones, remember to tell them often just how much you love them. My mother did not know how to say “I love you”. But you know what? I taught her how to say it. And it took a long time. Now that is another story entirely! For later.
Now, if you can get past this blog, here at Christmas time to boot, go out and spread some good cheer. I really am a very tired, but happy person. I can work and work and work and very rarely ever get tired. But give me the kind of emotional drain of today and it will sap me more than a day’s worth of hard labor.
Oops! I promised short blogs. Tomorrow I will do so.
Good night and God bless you! TELL SOMEONE EVERY DAY THAT YOU LOVE THEM! AND MEAN IT!
Saturday December 19 2015 I CANNOT STOP TIME
Saturday December 19 2015 I CANNOT STOP TIME
No matter how hard I try I cannot slow down time, much less stop it. December is the fastest month of the year no matter how prepared I am. At least I finished my Christmas Project! It is DONE! Now I can go on to the rest of what must be completed before next week. The greatest thing about this season is that I am hosting nothing. Shhh…I mustn’t say that too loud because then always something happens to take up my time anyway.
I met a young man in the gym today named Jake. He had a tattoo beautifully written in script on the back of his left shoulder area. His shirt wouldn’t allow me to see it all, but my curiosity was aroused and I asked him what the rest of it said. Here is the quote, “PLACE NO TRUST IN TOMORROW FOR NOTHING IS WORTH MORE THAN TODAY.” That is his direct quote. I agree with his quote. We truly must live in the moment of each day we have because we have no promise of tomorrow, nor even to the end of this day. Personally, I place my trust in God because only he knows what number of days I have before me. I fear not about how many days are left to me, because ultimately since my trust is in God, I know where I’ll be when my days are over. Then, I will be with my Lord and Savior, who sits at the right hand of God. I may not be sitting quite as close, but at least I will be up there somewhere!
I hope that this season you are celebrating the birth of our Lord, Jesus Christ. It is amazing how many celebrate CHRISTmas without celebrating the CHRIST for who it is intended.
BORN OF MAN
By Kathleen Martens
December 19 2015
Christ the King born of man
Hope and love His to command.
Rejection and scorn given His name,
In perfection was how He came.
Son of man begotten of God,
The Son of God in earthy bod.
Manger to cross He suffered and died
And His purpose was satisfied.
Sin and death conquered, when He was crucified.
And the meaning of Christmas? To give homage and praise to the Christ child who was born to give His life so that we may live. As the quote from yesterday’s (December 18th) Calendar Wisdom stated: THE SON OF GOD BECAME MAN TO ENABLE MEN TO BECOME THE SONS OF GOD.
Good night. Remember to take the time to rejoice in the birth of Christ!
FRIDAY DECEMBER 18 2015 THE BACKWARD DAY
Friday December 18 2015 THE BACKWARD DAY
When I awoke this morning I wanted soup for breakfast. Soup filled with many kinds of vegetables and wild grains and quinoa. For some reason that was what I was craving. So Dave said he’d have the same rather than our usual fruit, yogurt, bran, and for me walnuts. So soup it was. It was delicious and filling. Neither one of us wanted anything else to eat for 6 hours. So I guess you could say we had our dinner for breakfast and decided that we will eat our breakfast for dinner, thus “The Backward Day”. Furthermore, perchance I get to watch a movie or part of one I usually must stay awake later than I’d like to have the time to view it. So…today on our backward day I decided to watch the Christmas movie first thing after I finished my soup. And so I did.
So, since everything else is going backwards I decided to write my blog in the afternoon instead of evening. I guess I should have written it this morning but, oh well…
I just this moment received a phone call. While I traveled this spring my main purpose was to reconnect with those who have made a significant influence upon my life. I drove all the way down to San Antonio Texas from Dallas to see a couple who I believe contributed one of the greatest things to our lives that could ever be given. It was because of them that we were able to adopt our daughter Rebecca. David Moore went to be with the Lord on December 3, 2015. Peggi just called to let us know. I sent them a letter with a card for Christmas and she just received it today. She wanted to inform me that David would never see it because he was now with the Lord. I am so thankful that I was able to see them both in April. Every mile I drove was worth it. I know there are those who read this blog that know Dave and Peggi and would want to be informed of his death. We send our condolences to the family.
And the phone rings again. When I was in California my friend Jeanette and I took BART (Bay Area Rapid Transit) into San Francisco so we could visit with one of our friends from our youth. Kay lives in the heart of the city. She was another one of those special people in my life that was a great influence on me as were her mother and father. Both her mother and father are with the Lord. Kay has never married. She has a fabulous voice and during a period of her life she was part of a singing group that traveled to different places and put on concerts. The group was called the Brailletts. All three in the trio were blind since birth. They had the most pure sound to their harmony. They attracted large crowds. It was so good to see her when I was in California. She just called to wish me a Merry Christmas. My smile went from ear to ear. We sometimes forget just how much a personal greeting means. Kay does not use the computer or the smart phone. Her contact is through voice. As we talked I shared about our family having a portrait taken in October when we were in Branson. I told Kay I don’t send her pictures because she can’t see them. Then I asked her, the portrait you have of people is their voice, right? She said she had never thought about that but, yes, that was true. She hears a voice and she knows who it is. We look at a picture and we know who it is. Do you ever wonder what your “voice picture” sounds like? Perhaps you should give that some thought.
CHRISTMAS GREETINGS
By Kathleen Martens
December 18, 2015
Christmas greetings flood the season
In so many ways are shared.
A little note sent with love ,
Letting others know you care.
A Twitter a Tweet.
Or on a Face Book page.
Less personal contact
Seems more the rage.
A family photo with a letter,
Bragging rights for a year.
Perhaps a picture of the dog
Freshly groomed and sheered.
Just how many ways
Are there to send
Christmas greetings
To a friend?
If you can’t hear
You speak with hands.
If you can’t see
It’s a voice you demand.
So think personal
For those who receive
Which way is best
For them to perceive?
Well, today I sent a voice portrait. Though Kay has never seen me she loves me for who I am. I believe at times that Kay, who does not see, may have a deeper insight as to who I really am than those who do see me. I think we often times judge one another by what we look like, or how big or little we are, or what color we are, or what we are wearing. Think how wonderful it is to know someone loves you just as you are without any of those pre-judgmental aspects in place. I think it is pretty awesome to be loved that way.
Good night and God bless you!
P.S. OH YES! SOMETIMES CHRISTMAS GREETINGS ARE SENT VIA BLOG.
Thursday December 17 2015 BUSY TIME OF YEAR
Thursday December 17 2015 BUSY TIME OF YEAR
Since this is such a busy time of the year for me, as well as my readers, I plan to write very short blogs just to say hello to the faithful family followers and to those brave enough to take a few moments out of their busy day to check the computer.
My Christmas project is finished. I have one small task left to do. It will be completed tomorrow. Yeah!!!
I wish all of my readers a wonderful holiday season as we celebrate the birth of Jesus. My husband saved a song he heard on the TV for me to listen to called “Where Else Would a Lamb be Born?” sung by Steve Amerson. Mentioning the birth of Jesus reminded me of the song. If you have a chance to look it up on line and listen to Steve sing it, you will be pleasantly surprised. The song has beautiful words and the singing is amazing. I hope you take time out to enjoy hearing it. I just heard it for the first time and it came out in 2012. Shows you how far behind I am with the times. His song inspired my poem below.
BORN IN A LOWLY STABLE
By Kathleen Martens
December 17, 2015
I pray God to grant the wish
Of peace, joy, and love.
God provided the way
When He sent Jesus from above.
Jesus born in a lowly stable.
A king of such royal birth.
And the angels proclaimed aloud
The glory of his worth.
But the world did not see
Or understand the amazing gift,
That this little boy child
Someday sin would lift.
And so He did what was planned
Amongst tears pain and sorrow,
That peace, joy, and love
Would be in all your tomorrows.
He is he Savior of the world
Born in a lowly stable.
And His birth really happened.
His story is no fable.
Good night and God bless you. I WISH YOU PEACE, JOY, AND LOVE.
Tuesday December 16 2015 CRITICAL ARTICLE AND REVIEW
Tuesday December 16 2015 CRITICAL ARTICLE AND REVIEW
Just so you know, tonight’s blog is written as a “Critical Article and Review. I am using Webster’s Dictionary, third definition, of CRITICAL which is: “crucial, decisive, significant and important”. REVIEW is defined as: “evaluation, assessment, and examination”.
As I have mentioned in the last few days I am reading “THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE HOLY” published in 1961 by A.W. Tozer. On the first page it states that I am not to use or reproduce portions of this book “…except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.” So thus, I am writing a critical article and review.
So…the next step… making it brief!
Tozer has written about how we as individuals live by faith all our lives whether we believe in God or not. Most things we do not know why or how they work but we accept on faith that they do and will. Such things as electricity or a lightning bolt, we accept without understanding. We grow used to the things that we believe in, anything from supplied energy to nature. We don’t ponder the wonder of things because we just take them on faith that they are. Tozer writes, “How different are we who have grown used to it, who have become jaded with a satiety of wonder. He quotes the following from one who lived over a hundred years before him, “It is not by our superior insight that we escape the difficulty,” says Carlyle, “it is by our superior levity, our inattention, our want of insight. It is by not thinking that we cease to wonder at it…”
Tozer explains how we fail to ask question and search for answers. We just accept things of the world on faith by what is told to us and by what we have learned. “The world after all our science and sciences, is still a miracle; wonderful, inscrutable, magical and more, to whosoever will think of it.”, Tozer writes.
His following quote is the one I like the best: “Secularism, materialism, and the intrusive presence of things have put out the light in our souls and turned us into a generation of zombies. We cover our deep ignorance with words, but we are ashamed to wonder, we are afraid to whisper ‘mystery’.”
I know that without reading all the pages before and after these quotes above, total understanding of what he is writing about will not shine through. But take my word, Tozer is likening the above to a very deep spiritual aspect. The words that are written are powerful insights as to what has happened, and still is happening, to man as they go through this world without realizing the greatness of the Triune God, and His creation. Man can accept without understanding all that is around him, and yet, not “BELIEVE” in the one who created both them and the entire world and universe.
Perhaps one reason that it is so easy for me to believe is the fact that I have not lost my sense of wonder and awe of creation. I have not lost my awe of life and love. Nor have I lost my awe of the Creator Himself. Reading these few pages in Tozer’s book gave me a deeper insight into the spiritual aspect of what it means to wonder and imagine and believe. It is as if I have an insatiable appetite for nature and for wonder and for mystery. Where does it come from? Why can I never have enough? Why do I always desire more? Is this just how God designed me, personally, or is it God’s design for all to own this thirst for beauty and knowledge of the Creator? I cannot answer that question. All I know is, that I wonder, and I am not afraid to “whisper mystery”.
God is my Mystery. God is my Wonder. God is my Father. God is the one who lifts my head. God is my Shield. He is incomprehensible. He is unfathomable. He is UNCREATED and my mind cannot even grasp that concept, because eternity, ALWAYS WAS AND ALWAYS WILL BE. There is no beginning and there is no no end. AND GOD IS. No beginning and no end. I believe in Him simply because, how can I not?
One last “brief” paragraph from “THE KNOWLEDGE OF THE HOLY” to sum up the above:
“What God declares, the believing heart confesses without the need of further proof. Indeed, to seek proof is to admit doubt, and to obtain proof is to render faith superfluous. Everyone who possesses the gift of faith will recognize the wisdom of those daring words of one of the early Church fathers: “I believe that Christ died for me because it is incredible; I believe that He rose from the dead because it is impossible.”
I BELIEVE
The following is the poem I wrote this morning during my prayer and study time with the Lord. It is inspired by Tozer’s writings.
THE UNCREATED
By Kathleen Martens
December 16, 2015
Oh how I love You Father.
You, the only UNCREATED.
The only source that feeds my soul,
And in Your adoring presence I’m sated.
You satisfy all my needs
As You quench my soul’s thirsting.
You alone are my Creator
You alone, my heart’s nourishing.
How can I correctly ascribe
An attribute of who You are?
You are glory unfathomable,
Creator of all earth and stars.
So minuscule what I know.
What is true? How can I conceive?
For You are the Father who dwells in heaven
And it is only by faith I believe.
What question can I ask to know
As in reverence and humility I come?
Lord teach me how to adore
THE UNCREATED, THREE IN ONE!
WOW! I like that poem! Thank You Father for your gift to me.
JUST BELIEVE
By Kathleen Martens
December 16, 2015
Stop and view the world around you.
Stop and adore our Lord’s story.
Do not even try to comprehend who God is,
Just believe, and revel in His glory.
Good night and God bless each of you.
Tuesday December 15 2015 HISTORY IS HAPPENING
Tuesday December 15 2015 HISTORY IS HAPPENING
Comment regarding yesterday’s blog when I said I just seem to be getting more and more behind. Well today I didn’t even get to begin working on my Christmas project at home due to a change in plans. It was necessary for me to go to the car dealership for a car repair. I was there for about two hours. Afterwards I decided to do a few errands so I would not need to do them later in the week. So, by using up today I will not need to drive across town later this week since I accomplished everything today. Tomorrow is another day and I will accomplish (Lord wiling) what I must accomplish in regards to my Christmas project.
Tonight there is a Presidential debate on television. I do not like TV to disrupt what I do but I will make an exception for this program. I am trying to watch all the debates, both Republican and Democrat. I want to understand the position of each candidate. So this evening I am only making an appearance of writing, so as not to concern those who are faithful readers and wonder what is happening if I do not post my blog. I hope you too have a chance to listen to the debate so that you will at least know what each candidate stands for and be able to make a sound and rational decision. I vote for the candidate that proves to me to be the best choice and will represent the values that our country was founded on.
HISTORY IS HAPPENING
By Kathleen Martens
December 15, 2015
The day is short, the work is long
But this time to my poem belongs.
So I will say without ado
Though the words I write, will be few.
History is happening before my eyes,
And the television does not belie.
So I must go and listen well,
So I can think on what to dwell
I just pray that God’s plan
Will decide who is the man,
Or the woman, who will be
The one to keep our country free.
Good night and God bless you.
Monday December 14 2015 BEST LAID PLANS
Monday December 14 2015 BEST LAID PLANS
Do you ever feel that the more you do the more behind you become? It especially feels that way the month of December. For some reason I always fantasize that December will be peaceful and slow, everything accomplished by October, the tree up the Friday after Thanksgiving, and nothing left to do except go to parties and watch Christmas movies.
Once upon a time it was that way. I kid you not. But that was way back when…before I owned my own business. And somehow I am just hoping that it will be that way again. When? I do not know. I think in order for it to happen I would need to start in March. The surprising thing is, we don’t even do that much anymore in the way of decorating, tree, shopping, or party going. It just seems to take longer to live.
This reminiscing reminds me of a conversation I had with my newly retired neighbor about 20 or more years ago when he retired from his University of Wisconsin position as a German Professor. Anne and Hank lived next door when we moved in. Original builders of their home where they lived until both of them died in their living room, lying in a hospital bed, a few years apart. When Hank retired I was so envious of all his time and freedom. I thought it would never come for me. Oh how wrong I was. And the scary part is how fast it came. I asked Hank what he did with all his time. He looked at me in a jovial way and said, oh you will find out when you are older, it just takes a lot longer to do the same things so you don’t really have that much extra time after all. Oh my goodness, how right he was! In order not to frighten the younger generation (if any are reading this blog) I will refrain from expounding on exactly what he meant. I will just say to you, when it comes, you know what I mean. And it is not just that it takes longer, but I find that I now have more “things” that need taking care of. Oh well, it is sort of like you really don’t understand how it feels to have a baby until you have one. Then you become the expert!
Well, this day just up and danced away from me. I still can’t (or won’t) say what I did for most of the day so as not to ruin my surprise. My day is gone now and I have fifteen minutes before I must walk out the door for our Monday rendezvous. So I will wish all of you well and see what poem I can write in these few moments.
SCATTERED MOMENTS
By Kathleen Martens
December 14, 2015
Scattered moments, here and there
I wish I could collect each one.
All the accumulation of lost time
As between the cracks they fall.
Driving here and driving there
Then waiting for your turn.
And those precious seconds tick by
And never can they be re-earned.
Such a commodity is our time
And we must learn to spend it wisely.
Without becoming too selfish to give
For then our hours are miserly.
Give from the heart the gifts you have
Making this world a better place.
Just make certain you set aside a spell
That you can give without haste.
Each hour you give will come back to you
In abundance of love from others.
Use each hour with great purpose
That your heart will never be smothered.
Time well spent brings satisfaction
To know you have done your best.
Live each day to your fullest.
Let that be your quest.
Well, I guess that sums this blog up. It took seven minutes to write the above poem. Will publish but this blog it is not proofed as of yet. Oh well, NO TIME.
Good night and God bless you!
Sunday Sabbath December 13, 2015 ANOTHER BIRTHDAY TO REMEMBER
Sunday Sabbath December 13 2015 ANOTHER BIRTHDAY TO REMEMBER
Today is the anniversary of my mother’s 97th birthday. My mother went to be with her Lord In January 2010. There is a story in one of my journals that I wrote about her a few years ago, and though I searched for it, I could not locate it. I was going to share it here in my blog. Someday when I find it I will share her story. She was the oldest of thirteen children, and even in her humble existence, her life had both a tragic side as well as a side of triumph and beauty. I look forward to sharing part of her story. I give tribute to my mother on this, the 97th anniversary of her birth.
We are experiencing the effects of the warm weather patterns. It hit 61 degrees today IN DECEMBER! Needless to say, we have no snow. It has been raining off and on all day and right now the rain is beating down quite forcefully and noisily. It is a soothing mixture of runaway drops and splatters hitting different surfaces outside. There is just something about the sound of rain that is indescribable. It is like a quiet song to me that relaxes my soul.
I came home from church today and opened up windows in almost every room of the house to allow the house to air out. Winters are long here in Wisconsin and when it is over 50 degrees I try to let nature do an air exchange for me. It was awesome. We turned off the heat zones and had most windows opened for cross breeze. This was one my Sunday Sabbath days when I try not to do anything more than I must. I want you to take note, I actually watched TWO MOVIES this afternoon and evening. First however, I cooked a HUGE pot of soup. I’m still trying to use us my winter share vegetables. And oh, they are still so tasty and fresh. As I listen to the sound of the rain, wrapped up in soft blankets, smelling the aroma of herbs and vegetables simmering, and watching a movie, it makes for a wonderful relaxing Sabbath.
My zoom mode begins again tomorrow. Can’t write what I am doing because it is a surprise for some who read my blog. So I will just keep mum until after Christmas. But, it is time consuming. That’s all I will say.
Right this moment it is my bedtime (9:00 p.m.). Which, I have not accomplished in quite a while. But daily, I still hope to make that goal. I fear I am becoming a little lax in being so tough on myself. I guess that is a good thing! I just don’t get quite as much done. When I go to bed later I simply wake up later!
POEM OF RETIREMENT
By Kathleen Martens
December 13, 2015
Life has had its ups and downs,
Lots of smiles and some frowns.
Many years belonged to toil
When employment, our plans would foil.
But those years are now past
And the few ahead won’t really last.
So it is best to follow my heart
And allow, new dreams to start.
A time of tranquil reflection
Without cause for rejection.
A time to think and to ponder
All the mysteries of life to wonder.
A time we can stay up later
And have parties that are catered.
Time to let the dust settle
And let others tend the nettle.
Time to read and study God’s word,
Time to listen so God’s voice is heard
Time to dance and time to play
As well as laugh every single day.
Each is precious unto its own.
Our numbered days left are unknown.
But of the future we need not fret,
Whatever will be, will be yet.
So to the fullest live your life,
Be more flexible to have less strife.
In the shadows do not lurk,
And for enjoyment do God’s work.
Love others, and be kind.
Spread God’s joy so others will find
The way they too can be free
And live with God for eternity.
I guess the above poem would be considered a POEM OF RETIREMENT. I shall go up to the top and type that in as the title.
Good night and God bless you!
P.S. HAVE A HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAMA WITH ALL YOUR HEAVENLY FRIENDS AND FAMILY!
Visions of Poetry 