Thursday November 26 2015  THANKSGIVING DAY

I so cherish every single day.  And some days even more.  I am not naive enough to think that life will always be the same as it is now.  There are so many variables with all that is taking place in our world at this time.  Yes, today was special.  Very special because we celebrated the 8^th birthday of our oldest grandson.  Such an awesome and tender age is eight.  However, I couldn’t help but wonder what the world will be like when he eighteen or twenty eight or if the world as we know it now will even still be in existence.  As I sat down to eat I looked around and saw all the families together at other tables in the restaurant.  Families enjoying the day, the abundance of food, the resources to eat out, no worry as to what is coming tomorrow or if they will have enough to eat.  And then I thought of situations in the world that are just the opposite.  So many thousands not knowing if they will even have food to eat tomorrow.  It is in moments such as these that a deep sadness enters my heart and I wonder if there isn’t more that I could do.

I am so thankful for all the abundance that is in my life.  I choose to never take it for granted.  Yes, I also choose to live in the moment so as not to put myself in situations where I worry, but my eyes are still open to that which is taking place globally.  Even though life should be lived in the moment be certain to know and understand what is taking place around you, in your own inner circle, your city, your state, your country, and abroad.  Do not ever think that you are immune to what is taking place in the Mideast.  Our very way of life is being threatened and everyone needs to be aware of what is taking place and how vulnerable we are to having our own lifestyle altered due to the ramifications of so many others losing their freedoms.  Evil in the world and is marching forward, getting closer and closer to affecting the quality of life we live in the United States.  Do not take your freedoms for granted.  Fight for your freedoms and be thankful that we still have many more freedoms than most countries.  But be aware.  The world is changing.  We never know if we will ever have another day like today.  Be thankful for this day, for the abundance of food, for water, for clean air, for groceries on the shelf, a car to drive, a job to go to, and the freedom to worship at a church of your choice.  Today is the one day of the year to pause and give deliberate thanks.  Perhaps we should deliberately pause and give thanks for every day of the year.

I do not know why a blog such as this would pour from my fingers today.  I meant to write something upbeat about my son’s birthday party and it just went down another avenue.  I am revealing another level of who I am.  I think it a good thing to do once in a while.  It doesn’t mean I am melancholy.  It just means that I look at life realistically.  Things are happening in the world.  Be aware.  Live in the moment.  Put your trust in God that you need not ever fear.  We may not be able to change the world or wipe out hunger but we can make a difference in the lives around us.  Be open to the plan that God has for your life and do your best to reach out and make the world a little bit better for those you come in contact with.

So, let’s go back to the birthday boy.  I never want to miss the opportunity to celebrate even one of his birthdays with him.  My friend and neighbor, Carolyn, gave me an insight as to what a birthday celebration really means. From the time I first knew Carolyn she brought over birthday presents to celebrate my day.  She has given me birthday parties inviting people she didn’t even know because they were important to me.  This was so amazing to me.  When she found out that Dave and I didn’t really celebrate our birthdays she put a stop to that.  Birthday parties were not the norm in our family.  The only family birthday party I remember for myself was when I turned twelve years old.  I remember how grown up I felt.  I truly did think I was grown.  My sister Velma lived in Oakland in an apartment and the one and only time I ever went to her apartment was on my 12^th birthday.  She actually gave me a little birthday get together. I felt so special and she made me feel so grownup.  She gave me a gold Seiko wristwatch with a little tiny clock face.  It was just like the ones that the grownup ladies wore.  I can’t even begin to tell you what it did for my self-esteem and even my self-worth.  Probably a bit too much!  I actually think I still possess that little watch.  I wore it long after it wore out and didn’t work anymore because I so loved the feeling of importance it gave me.  Like I’ve said before, we didn’t have much so I made the most of what I had.

I hope someday Zachariah and Xander will look back on our family birthday parties and remember them with joy.  I hope it will instill in them just how important their life is.  One of the best things we do at each birthday party is to go around the table and each person tells a story about the birthday person.  That always seems to bring up stories about the others who are also present and we laugh and tear up and forget the time.  Tonight as I watched Zach, I could see how very special he felt, how happy the stories made him, and realized just how much he was learning about himself.  His mom told the story about him being three months old when she laid him down on the bed for just a second and he rolled off and fell on the floor.  She told all that followed and his eyes just glistened with the mystery of the story being told.  He laughed his amazing laugh and it made my heart sing to be with him, watching his enjoyment of learning new things about himself.  My one goal in doing this is to instill in him how important he is to our family and how his life is special enough to celebrate.   

And so is your life important enough to celebrate.  Actually, the greatest celebration you can do is to daily thank God for the life he has given you. 

To show you how my mind skips around I am going go off on a “rabbit run” thought.  It just popped into my head but seems to be pertinent for this blog.  Year ago I heard our minister, Pastor Jack Hayford in Danville California, talk about how our lives affect the generations in our family.  He informed us that studies have shown that each generation will have an influence that goes down to the fifth generation.   I really gave some thought to that.  My grandfather, my mother’s father, was a cruel man in many ways.  His physical abuse really affected his 13 children in so many different ways.  My mother was never told that she was loved, thus she never told her children.  I was one of those children.  Did my mother’s parenting influence me?  Yes.  Being one of six children I could also see how it affected my siblings, each one in a different way.  I will not share what I observed in my siblings but for me it was a bit different than their perspective and choices.  I looked at my mother and decided that I would do things just the opposite as to how I was raised.  For a starter, when our daughter was born I told my husband that for the rest of her life, if I was with her she would hear me say “I LOVE YOU”.  From the day we brought her home from the hospital I spoke my promise.  As a child I never heard my mother day “I love you” to me.  Years later I taught her how to receive those words from me and to say them back to me.  It didn’t come easy for her.  But somehow, I always knew she loved me deeply.  When I told my husband my plan he looked at me in all seriousness and said if you are going to say that to her then I am going to say it too.  And to this day, if we are together or speak on the phone there is never a time that goes by with telling her “I love you”.  We did the same with our second born as well.  I just have opportunity to say it to him in person more often that I do with Rebecca because of his close proximity.

My mother’s parenting, affected by her parent’s parenting, influenced my parenting.  My parenting (and I include my husband in all these “My’s”), influenced our son’s parenting and his parenting will influence his sons.  Even though I have not been cruel to my children like my grandfather was, it was his influence on my mother that cause me to make the decisions I did.  Our grandchildren will have no memory of either my grandparents, or my parents, but none the less, they are recipients for what was passed on and will be influenced to pass on how they were parented.  Hopefully, the love that we pour into our grandchildren will indeed go on down another five generations but hopefully the influence of my grandfather will no longer affect the generations that come after them due to them being the fifth generation following in his lineage.

If you are interested in reading a very insightful and intense true story about the grandfather I speak of there is a very interesting book you can read.  It is self-published so you would need to contact me for information on how to obtain a copy.  The title is “A BAKER’S DOZEN” by Anne Chaney.  When you start reading it you won’t be able to put it down.

I thank God for every single day.  You may get tired of reading these words over and over but I will probably keep writing them anyway. 

FOR EACH DAY IS NEW

By Kathleen Martens

November 26 2015

No day is ever the same

As it was the day before.

Each day is unto its own

In knowing how to score.

When it is over

It will never return.

From yesterday’s moments

There’s no more to earn.

And tomorrow is not promised.

So today is the total sum.

And it is only in the passing seconds

That it even comes.

So be thankful to hold dear

The moments allotted you,

And never try to live in the past

For each day is new.

Oh my!  I just put the kids to bed for the night.  I stayed up late with them so we could keep on celebrating by watching a Curious George DVD.  Very enlightening!  But it was worth every moment of snuggling with Xander on my lap.  I think that Zach thinks he is too old to snuggle.  I don’t think you are ever too OLD to snuggle but I will admit that He might be a bit too big to fit on my lap. 

Isn’t it awesome to know that we will never outgrow God’s lap?

It is almost 11:00 p.m.  Way past my bedtime.  So I will say goodnight and sleep tight!

P.S.  Look below and view the picture of Zachariah at the end of his big day of celebration!