Monday November 30 2015  WHERE HAVE ALL THE DAYS GONE?

The last day of the month in what seems like the blink of an eye.  Is it just me, or does life seem to accelerate as you get older?  Well, come to think about it, I’m not alone because I remember my friend giving some wisdom pertaining to that just a week ago.  How do we slow the days down?  Is there way?  Maybe the government needs to do a multimillion dollar study on that issue.  By the time it was finished I would probably be past the point of no return.  Maybe I’ll just have to learn how to live each day slower.

I have discovered that it really does take me a lot longer to accomplish things than it used to.  I keep hearing my sister’s words ringing more true in my ears.  She is feeding me fodder for getting my life in order.  And, believe it or not, I am thinking a lot about what she has been “whispering” in my ear.  Never underestimate the power your words may have in someone else’s life.  She mentioned in an email recently that the older you get the harder it is to make changes.  I check that statement as being true in my life.  One of the situations Dave and I vacillate on is whether to “stay in place” or pack up and move.  We’ll take the first step and just downsize our possessions.  That alone will be difficult enough.  I think I have enough “stuff” to open my own museum and the “stuff” is probably all old enough to go into a museum.  So if you think about praying for me in the coming year please pray that it will be easier for me to rid myself of unnecessary baggage, (you know, like all my kids baby clothes).  Come to think of it, my children’s clothing may just fit into the category of VINTAGE by now.  Perhaps I should rethink getting rid of them.  JUST KIDDING!  But I am not kidding about the prayer.

Today is Monday.  I almost said ‘today has been a TYPICAL Monday, but then I changed it because I don’t really know what a typical Monday is, much less any other typical day.  What is typical?  I do not know.  Every day is different.  I think that is my new reality.  I love to be able to just change my plans midstream and readdress the day in whichever way I think it will work best for the week.  I do not look at just one isolated day to decide my schedule, where I should go, or what errands I should run.  I first look to see which days are heaviest scheduled, such as Thursday when I will be gone all day.  And that will make a difference as what I do on the other days.  I know I have a lot of cooking to do on Friday for a large church dinner and will need to pick up the items on Wednesday since Thursday is unavailable to me.  It is important to have all the ingredients purchased before I begin cooking or the  day and event will not work for me.  So, for me, my typical day is always untypical. 

I do believe it would be a bit easier to have a typical day of retirement if I was a man.  I look at my husband and he seems to be so free in what he does and how he does it.  He doesn’t see what I see that needs to be done.  Don’t get me wrong, he is a great help, even in his limited capacity during his post-surgical recovery time.  But, men just don’t figure in all the little things, cooking, shopping, cleaning, toilets, floors, etc..  For me there is always something else to do, something else to put away, another meal to prepare, something else to scrub, not to mention the desire to read which has been put on the back burner for the time being.  I’m not complaining, just stating the facts ma’am.  So, for the month of December I am going to act like I am retired!  Dave suggested he have a day off.  So I agreed as long as I could have a day off.  A day off to me means that he does all the meal preparation, the clean-up, and anything else that must be done on my day off.  Sounds like fun!  And I would do the same for him.  The only difference is that on his day off I would just do all the same things I usually do every day anyway!  Hey, there I have found it.  My typical day!  My typical day is that I am just always DOING!  I look forward to my untypical day!

I know that when someone reads what another has written, sometimes it is taken differently that the writer meant.  After all, you cannot hear my voice inflection, nor see the twinkle in my eye, or my mouth twitch in a half smile.  I begrudge nothing I do, regardless if it is for me or for my husband.  And I know my husband’s attitude is the same.  But it will be fun to really not do anything on my “do nothing day”.  He said he is game.

I have just a few moments before I am leaving for a Monday night rendezvous at a friend’s house to view an old Jean Arthur movie.  We went last week for the first time and both enjoyed it immensely.  Dave may very well be home tonight due to the fact that he is quite dizzy today for some reason.  If the roads are not icy I will go alone.  We’ve actually had some rain last night and today.  Right now Dave just gave me a reading of 37 degrees so I should be okay.  However, I don’t really like driving at night.

RUSHED FOR TIME

By Kathleen Martens

November 30, 2016

Rushed for time is what I am

I must leave, so in a hurry.

Just a short poem to finish my day,

As I am in such a flurry.

Off to enjoy a movie of old,

And fellowship with our friends.

And as usual when you are having fun,

So quickly the evening will end.

So good night, my fingertips say

To those who are still tagging along.

I love to greet you each and every day

At the computer my heart belongs.

Tomorrow is another day

And I shall embrace it as such.

Should I live to awaken the morn

It will be appreciated very much.

Good night and God bless you.

Farewell November!

Sunday Sabbath November 29 2015  ARE YOU AWAKE?

The alarm sounded this morning.  After being up very late for the last four nights, I was quite disappointed that the alarm was ringing in the middle of the night.  Well, at least it was still dark.  Dark, and very cold outside of the covers.  What is so unusual about hearing the alarm is that I am almost always awake before any alarm can go off.  Actually, I had awakened at 5:30 a.m., went to the potty room, and crawled back between my warm covers knowing full well the alarm would go off in a few moments.  Well, when it did ring I was already in never-never land, sound asleep.  It was as if I couldn’t move.  I was still and quiet just hoping that it was a bad dream and it really wasn’t time to get out of bed to get ready for early church service.  I hear a quiet voice coming from the other side of the bed saying, “Are you awake”?  “Yes”, I slowly responded.  “Oh, I didn’t know,” my husband replied back.  “You know why I didn’t know”, not waiting for a response he then said,  “It’s because you weren’t talking”.

Well, that comment made me burst out in laughter!  In other words, he was insinuating that if I am awake, THEN I AM TALKING!  And you know what?  He is probably right, especially in the morning.  That is usually our most talkative time. INSERT: (MY HUSBAND HAD TO ADD A COMMENT AS HE PROOF READ…”THAT IS ONLY SECOND TO ALL THE OTHER TIMES”). I love those times but it just came too early for a sleep deprived body.  You know what one of my favorite things I love about my husband is?  Well, of course you don’t, so I’ll tell you.  I love that there is never a day that goes by that he does not make me break out in laughter.  So that is how my day began, with an outburst of laughter that I couldn’t contain.  If you don’t laugh much you should try it sometime, even if you have to just start out with fake laughter until you sound so ridiculous to yourself that you just start laughing at yourself.  An excellent book to read on that subject is “ANATOMY OF AN ILLNESS AS PERCEIVED BY THE PATIENT” by Norman Cousins, written in 1979.  It is still pertinent in today’s world.  Laughter is one of the best things you can do for yourself each day.  Try it, you might like it!

So, today is Sunday.  A beautiful Sunday Sabbath, blue sunny skies, green grass and 19 degrees outside.  The snow is all melted and it looks like autumn again, but with winter’s temperatures.  Winter is now officially less than a month away.  On this Sunday Sabbath Dave and I once again realized we needed a break from “doing”.  (I could get used to this.)  Today I took it literally and decided after fixing lunch that I would do just that.  So I did the only sensible thing to do, I immidiately got undressed and slipped into sweater pants (stretchy waistband), a long sleeved soft knit shirt, my fuzzy socks, and decided if I was going to do nothing I would do it very comfortably.  And then I remembered!  Oh dear, I have a client coming over this afternoon to pick up their wedding album.  So…I am still in my comfortable clothes.  Our time is open ended so I called and left a message that they are to call me before they come.  It is supposed to be around the 5:30 p.m. time frame.  So, hopefully they’ll call first and give me time to change.  It just feels too good to change before I must.

Other than expecting them today I am so hoping nothing else will happen.  I still want to watch that Christmas movie I have been longing for this past week.  Dave even found a string of movies on a religious channel that all seemed to be the wholesome kind of movies that I like to watch.  He scheduled a whole list of them to record for me.  I guess I am now set with enough movies to watch at least one a day.  Remember, the month of December is our month off.  I have dreamed of a month like this for years.  When I was working it was almost impossible to find the time to spend watching a television show, much less a two hour movie.  So, I just never took the time to watch any movies except at Christmas time.  Dave will hopefully be recovered by Christmas and able to go back to his workouts, and hopefully my elbow and shoulder will have recovered sufficiently for me to use fully. 

When I hurt my elbow almost 4 weeks ago I think I also damaged my right shoulder.  The elbow still gives me pain if I do things I shouldn’t be doing.  But it is the shoulder that is causing me the most consternation.  Very limited in movement but I do the exercises I was instructed to do every day to keep it mobile.  If the shoulder doesn’t heal I will need to have it looked at further.  I have already had a rotator cuff repair on each shoulder.  That is not something I would ever want to go through again.  I was glad I only had two shoulders.  I never gave it a thought that I could hurt one again.  Oh well, maybe it is just old age and it will eventually go away.  However, it does not seem like old age goes away (at least not until we draw our last breath).  So you see, there is always hope for a good ending!

I truly hope you are having a wonderful, restful, God inspiring, Sabbath.  I shall take seriously the words that God has commanded.  REST ON THE SABBATH!  It makes for a guilt free rest time. 

A TIME OF SURRENDER

By Kathleen Martens

November 29, 2015

A day of rest to free the spirit

The body and the soul.

A time of complete surrender

On Sabbath should be your goal.

Yield to the needs of body

To replenish, renew, and rest.

One day in all the week

To do what is fully best.

What an absolute wonderful God

To give such a command.

He knew that are bodies would tire

And rest they would demand.

So take to heart and use it well

This Sabbath that God created.

For His word is ever true

And should not be debated.

Fifty two times in a year

We have permission to just be.

No expectation to perform

That body and spirt be free.

So I shall do such a thing

As God has told me to.

And on Monday I will rise,

Rested, relaxed, renewed.

Good afternoon.  Praying you have a wonderful and fulfilling week ahead.  And remember, take time to rest on the Sabbath.  God bless you.

Saturday November 28 2015  A DO NOTHING DAY

Today was one of those rare days when both Dave and I decided it was a day to choose to do nothing.  For me “to do nothing” is great!  AT LEAST FOR A HALF HOUR.  So I chose to do nothing and watched a half hour T.V. program.  But that was only after I decided to put something away, and when I looked in my cupboard I was utterly disgusted.  So I decided to tackle a few shelves, and get them organized and that was after I first cleaned a drawer out which had become too cluttered with pens and pencils and clothes pins (which we use to keep bags closed).  Of course when I finished, not everything would fit back in the cupboards.  Some was food I wanted to keep, some was food to give away, and some was food to throw away.  I so dislike allowing food to expire before being used.  So, after all was done I rested on the couch and watched my half hour program and a bit of news. 

Of course the rest gave me impetus to then get up raring to go!  NOT!  But I did get up anyway because I had made a commitment to myself to go to the gym.  I always feel so much more energized after a good sweaty workout.  While I was gone Dave actually gave up some of his precious, do nothing day, to peel and chop vegetables for me.  You see, I had more broth from yesterday’s turkey, no place to put it in the freezer, and I needed to use it up.  So of course I made more soup.  You see, the soup can go back into the containers that the broth was in and then we can eat it up, have company over, or give it away.  It is just the making of it that I enjoy doing.  And believe it or not, that is what I wanted to do on my “to do nothing” day.  It always makes it so much more fun when there is nothing pressing in on my time and that was the wondrous part of the day.  I love my grandkids, but boy it sure makes me realize what freedom I have after they have been around for a couple of days.  I loved it when I was parent and seemed to get everything done that needed doing.  Now, it takes a little longer to do just the necessary and kids add a bit more “necessary” to do.  Needless to say, Dave and I were quite happy to have a do nothing day.  Can’t wait until we have them over again soon.  Maybe they will be able to come over during the Christmas break (which is now referred to by the schools as the winter break).  I love having them over midweek because it just sort of emphasizes and reminds us “HEY, WE ARE RETIRED”!  I like that phrase!

So, my do nothing day turned out very well.  I did nothing I HAD TO DO and only that which I chose to do.  Dinner is now over, the beans just finished cooking that I will be adding to the soup, the soup is still on the stove cooling off and the dishes are almost finished washing in the dishwasher.  The laundry is working diligently to do what we could not do while the boys were here, and it is not even 8:00 p.m. as of yet.  A pretty good do nothing day I would say!  Oh, by the way, Dave chose to start all the yearend tax organizing so that we will be ready to have our taxes done after all the necessary documents arrive in the mail.  He likes to have taxes done as early as possible.  This will be a big year of organizing and calculating due to retiring and finally closing the business down. 

Oh yes, we also have our tree decorated already too.  We just haven’t decided exactly where we want to put it this year.  It is perfect for us.  It is fifteen INCHES high and sits on a table.  It has an electric cord that lights up all the little lights on it.  That will be the sum of our holiday décor.  Please don’t think me a scrooge.  There was a time when we went all out.  At one place we lived we actually had fresh cut trees that were fifteen FEET high.  We anchored them to the upstairs balcony that looked down over the living room.  Those were fun, magical times when our children were young (and so were we).  But now, well, we are just content without all the extra things to do.  Perhaps I will decorate one more time some year, but this isn’t the year.  Too much happening this year and we will just enjoy our son’s big tree that his family put up yesterday and decorated today.  We’ll get to enjoy theirs when we go visit them.  I love it when life just sort of simplifies itself!

ONCE UPON A TIME

By Kathleen Martens

November 28, 2015

Once upon a time

In a long ago land.

There was a mother and father,

A woman and a man.

There was a boy and a girl

Three years apart,

A brother and a sister

Both very smart.

They loved all the hoopla

Of decorating a tree,

Waiting in anticipation

For Santa to see.

They would set out the cookies

Make sure the chimney was clear

Knowing Santa Clause

Soon would be near.

As for the mother and father

It was their delight

To prepare all that was needed

For their Christmas Eve night.

The children now grown

And moved away.

And the tree unimportant

In a sad little way.

Where there was once noise

And excitement galore,

It is now too quiet,

For the kids are no more.

And the mother and father

Sit quietly at home,

Remembering the joy

They once did own.

Oh, but alas!

There is more to this story,

For they now have two grandsons

And life is not boring.

For now all the work

Belongs to another,

But they still get to enjoy it

This father and mother.

They pack up their gifts

And drive across town,

And never is there time

To wear a frown.

What lights up their day

Are these two little boys,

Who are the treasures of their hearts,

And bring them such joy!

Oh it is fun

To be getting so old.

To some it may be sad,

But to us it is gold!

We are looking forward to the Christmas season and we hope you are too.  Remember, I have a goal for the month of December.  Actually, two goals.  The first, is to watch a Christmas movie every day of the month, and the second, is to eat entirely from that which is in the freezer!  Maybe I won’t cook for one month.  I may have some withdrawal pains but I think I would survive.  Just don’t hold me to it. 

You know what the bad part is about the fact that my husband helps me proofread my blogs, it is that he always reads what I write, AND HE MIGHT HOLD ME TO IT!  On the other hand, probably not.  He likes his fresh salads now too.  But he still won’t eat Brussels sprouts.

Good night and God bless you.

Thursday November 26 2015  THANKSGIVING DAY

I so cherish every single day.  And some days even more.  I am not naive enough to think that life will always be the same as it is now.  There are so many variables with all that is taking place in our world at this time.  Yes, today was special.  Very special because we celebrated the 8^th birthday of our oldest grandson.  Such an awesome and tender age is eight.  However, I couldn’t help but wonder what the world will be like when he eighteen or twenty eight or if the world as we know it now will even still be in existence.  As I sat down to eat I looked around and saw all the families together at other tables in the restaurant.  Families enjoying the day, the abundance of food, the resources to eat out, no worry as to what is coming tomorrow or if they will have enough to eat.  And then I thought of situations in the world that are just the opposite.  So many thousands not knowing if they will even have food to eat tomorrow.  It is in moments such as these that a deep sadness enters my heart and I wonder if there isn’t more that I could do.

I am so thankful for all the abundance that is in my life.  I choose to never take it for granted.  Yes, I also choose to live in the moment so as not to put myself in situations where I worry, but my eyes are still open to that which is taking place globally.  Even though life should be lived in the moment be certain to know and understand what is taking place around you, in your own inner circle, your city, your state, your country, and abroad.  Do not ever think that you are immune to what is taking place in the Mideast.  Our very way of life is being threatened and everyone needs to be aware of what is taking place and how vulnerable we are to having our own lifestyle altered due to the ramifications of so many others losing their freedoms.  Evil in the world and is marching forward, getting closer and closer to affecting the quality of life we live in the United States.  Do not take your freedoms for granted.  Fight for your freedoms and be thankful that we still have many more freedoms than most countries.  But be aware.  The world is changing.  We never know if we will ever have another day like today.  Be thankful for this day, for the abundance of food, for water, for clean air, for groceries on the shelf, a car to drive, a job to go to, and the freedom to worship at a church of your choice.  Today is the one day of the year to pause and give deliberate thanks.  Perhaps we should deliberately pause and give thanks for every day of the year.

I do not know why a blog such as this would pour from my fingers today.  I meant to write something upbeat about my son’s birthday party and it just went down another avenue.  I am revealing another level of who I am.  I think it a good thing to do once in a while.  It doesn’t mean I am melancholy.  It just means that I look at life realistically.  Things are happening in the world.  Be aware.  Live in the moment.  Put your trust in God that you need not ever fear.  We may not be able to change the world or wipe out hunger but we can make a difference in the lives around us.  Be open to the plan that God has for your life and do your best to reach out and make the world a little bit better for those you come in contact with.

So, let’s go back to the birthday boy.  I never want to miss the opportunity to celebrate even one of his birthdays with him.  My friend and neighbor, Carolyn, gave me an insight as to what a birthday celebration really means. From the time I first knew Carolyn she brought over birthday presents to celebrate my day.  She has given me birthday parties inviting people she didn’t even know because they were important to me.  This was so amazing to me.  When she found out that Dave and I didn’t really celebrate our birthdays she put a stop to that.  Birthday parties were not the norm in our family.  The only family birthday party I remember for myself was when I turned twelve years old.  I remember how grown up I felt.  I truly did think I was grown.  My sister Velma lived in Oakland in an apartment and the one and only time I ever went to her apartment was on my 12^th birthday.  She actually gave me a little birthday get together. I felt so special and she made me feel so grownup.  She gave me a gold Seiko wristwatch with a little tiny clock face.  It was just like the ones that the grownup ladies wore.  I can’t even begin to tell you what it did for my self-esteem and even my self-worth.  Probably a bit too much!  I actually think I still possess that little watch.  I wore it long after it wore out and didn’t work anymore because I so loved the feeling of importance it gave me.  Like I’ve said before, we didn’t have much so I made the most of what I had.

I hope someday Zachariah and Xander will look back on our family birthday parties and remember them with joy.  I hope it will instill in them just how important their life is.  One of the best things we do at each birthday party is to go around the table and each person tells a story about the birthday person.  That always seems to bring up stories about the others who are also present and we laugh and tear up and forget the time.  Tonight as I watched Zach, I could see how very special he felt, how happy the stories made him, and realized just how much he was learning about himself.  His mom told the story about him being three months old when she laid him down on the bed for just a second and he rolled off and fell on the floor.  She told all that followed and his eyes just glistened with the mystery of the story being told.  He laughed his amazing laugh and it made my heart sing to be with him, watching his enjoyment of learning new things about himself.  My one goal in doing this is to instill in him how important he is to our family and how his life is special enough to celebrate.   

And so is your life important enough to celebrate.  Actually, the greatest celebration you can do is to daily thank God for the life he has given you. 

To show you how my mind skips around I am going go off on a “rabbit run” thought.  It just popped into my head but seems to be pertinent for this blog.  Year ago I heard our minister, Pastor Jack Hayford in Danville California, talk about how our lives affect the generations in our family.  He informed us that studies have shown that each generation will have an influence that goes down to the fifth generation.   I really gave some thought to that.  My grandfather, my mother’s father, was a cruel man in many ways.  His physical abuse really affected his 13 children in so many different ways.  My mother was never told that she was loved, thus she never told her children.  I was one of those children.  Did my mother’s parenting influence me?  Yes.  Being one of six children I could also see how it affected my siblings, each one in a different way.  I will not share what I observed in my siblings but for me it was a bit different than their perspective and choices.  I looked at my mother and decided that I would do things just the opposite as to how I was raised.  For a starter, when our daughter was born I told my husband that for the rest of her life, if I was with her she would hear me say “I LOVE YOU”.  From the day we brought her home from the hospital I spoke my promise.  As a child I never heard my mother day “I love you” to me.  Years later I taught her how to receive those words from me and to say them back to me.  It didn’t come easy for her.  But somehow, I always knew she loved me deeply.  When I told my husband my plan he looked at me in all seriousness and said if you are going to say that to her then I am going to say it too.  And to this day, if we are together or speak on the phone there is never a time that goes by with telling her “I love you”.  We did the same with our second born as well.  I just have opportunity to say it to him in person more often that I do with Rebecca because of his close proximity.

My mother’s parenting, affected by her parent’s parenting, influenced my parenting.  My parenting (and I include my husband in all these “My’s”), influenced our son’s parenting and his parenting will influence his sons.  Even though I have not been cruel to my children like my grandfather was, it was his influence on my mother that cause me to make the decisions I did.  Our grandchildren will have no memory of either my grandparents, or my parents, but none the less, they are recipients for what was passed on and will be influenced to pass on how they were parented.  Hopefully, the love that we pour into our grandchildren will indeed go on down another five generations but hopefully the influence of my grandfather will no longer affect the generations that come after them due to them being the fifth generation following in his lineage.

If you are interested in reading a very insightful and intense true story about the grandfather I speak of there is a very interesting book you can read.  It is self-published so you would need to contact me for information on how to obtain a copy.  The title is “A BAKER’S DOZEN” by Anne Chaney.  When you start reading it you won’t be able to put it down.

I thank God for every single day.  You may get tired of reading these words over and over but I will probably keep writing them anyway. 

FOR EACH DAY IS NEW

By Kathleen Martens

November 26 2015

No day is ever the same

As it was the day before.

Each day is unto its own

In knowing how to score.

When it is over

It will never return.

From yesterday’s moments

There’s no more to earn.

And tomorrow is not promised.

So today is the total sum.

And it is only in the passing seconds

That it even comes.

So be thankful to hold dear

The moments allotted you,

And never try to live in the past

For each day is new.

Oh my!  I just put the kids to bed for the night.  I stayed up late with them so we could keep on celebrating by watching a Curious George DVD.  Very enlightening!  But it was worth every moment of snuggling with Xander on my lap.  I think that Zach thinks he is too old to snuggle.  I don’t think you are ever too OLD to snuggle but I will admit that He might be a bit too big to fit on my lap. 

Isn’t it awesome to know that we will never outgrow God’s lap?

It is almost 11:00 p.m.  Way past my bedtime.  So I will say goodnight and sleep tight!

P.S.  Look below and view the picture of Zachariah at the end of his big day of celebration!

Wednesday November 25 2015  THANKSGIVING EVE

Since we have Christmas Eve I thought we should celebrate Thanksgiving Eve.  Especially this Thanksgiving Eve.  The reason?  Because I do not need to cook tomorrow, this coming from someone who thoroughly enjoys cooking.  I just don’t like to do it on the holiday.  Instead, we are traipsing down to the Maple Leaf Restaurant for dinner.  But alas, that means no turkey leftovers for the week.  Oh well, I guess I’ll just pick up my fresh 12 to 16 pound turkey at the Bavarian Store in Fitchburg on Friday which I ordered a couple of weeks ago.  It was a little strange ordering it for the day following Thanksgiving but the store clerk said they would have a fresh one for me on Friday.  So, I will cook on Friday instead of Thursday.  Just think of all the good soup I can make with that batch of broth!

A very fruitful day today.  Everything was sent in to the photo lab before closing time tonight.  I will make my deadline for next week.  I worked the entire day to finish all the school’s photo post production work.  Such a rewarding feeling.  But the best prize of all is that I didn’t get dressed the entire day.  I am still in my housecoat from when I woke up this morning.  Love it!  Simply love it!

So now perhaps I will be able to watch my Christmas movies.  Probably not tonight or tomorrow or Friday due to every hour is booked up, but at least I have hope!  After talking to my “older friends” the other night I am intent on doing two things.  The first thing is to do as much as I can do while I can still do it and the other is to practice listening to my body so I’ll know when I am getting old so I can slow down.  I’m looking forward to the first, but not the latter.

Remember the question I asked Virginia and Joe, as you have aged what was the one thing that your caught you unaware and unprepared for?  I keep revising the question so it may be worded a bit differently.  There were eight of us present for John’s 70^th birthday party and every answer was interesting, at least to me.  Remember that I am intent on learning all I can about all I can.  I decided I wanted to see old age through the lives of those who are experiencing it firsthand.  At least some are realizing they are experiencing it.

This was my question to everyone, IF THERE WAS ONE THING THAT AGING SURPRISED YOU WITH, WHAT WOULD IT BE?  The first person I asked was John.

John’s response:

“I FEEL SO YOUNG!  HOW BLESSED I AM TO FEEL THIS GOOD AT 70.  I THOUGHT I WOULD BE OLD BY NOW AND I’M NOT.” 

I would say that would be a good surprise.  I feel the same but I am not quite as old as John yet.”

Dave’s comment:

“YOUR MIND WRITES CHECKS THAT YOUR BODY CANNOT CASH.”

I do find Dave’s comment true!

I then asked Jody the same thing.  Here is her response:

“WHEN YOU LOOK IN THE MIRROR AS YOU GET OLDER, BUT YOU STILL FEEL LIKE THE 16 OR 17 YEAR OLD, LIKE THE YOUNG PERSON YOU HAVE ALWAYS BEEN ON THE INSIDE…IT FEELS STRANGE BECAUSE I THOUGHT I WOULD FEEL OLDER.”

My response to her was that I knew what she meant.  I used the analogy regarding the fact that every day, just like everyone else does, I look into the mirror and I never look any different than I did yesterday.  And if that is the case, then why do I look like this now when I didn’t look like this 30 years ago or 20 years ago or even 5 years ago?

Bob was the next.

“I’D BE KIND OF LEFT IN THE SAME BOAT AS JOHN.  I WAKE UP EVERY MORNING AND I JUST HAVE TO SAY THANK YOU LORD, ANOTHER GOOD DAY.”

I think that would be a pretty good boat to be in.  I wonder if there is room for me?

Jody’s husband Don was next.

“I’M SURPRISED BOTH WAYS. SURPRISED WHAT I CAN STILL DO, CUTTING FIRE WOOD, SPLITTING WOOD WITH A MAUL, CLIMBING LADDERS, WORKING ON THE ROOF OF MY HOUSE, BUT ON THE NEGATIVE SIDE, I AM SURPRISED AT HOW MUCH STRENGTH I’VE LOST.  I USED TO BE ABLE TO PICK UP A COUPLE OF HUNDRED POUNDS AND NOW 50 POUNDS IS ABOUT IT.  I DON’T HAVE THE ENDURANCE I USED TO HAVE.  THAT CAUGHT ME UNAWARE.”

And next was Maryann:

“YOU KNOW THE FIRST TIME I REALLY FELT THAT I WAS GETTING OLDER WAS LAST YEAR AND IT CAUGHT ME UNAWARE.  I THOUGHT, LIKE THIS ISN’T FAIR.  I AM 74 YEARS OLD. (Dave asked her what she thought it was that caused her to be aware of it last year?)  HER REPLY:  “IT WAS JUST DOING THE WORK I LOVED TO DO, BEING OUTSIDE.  DOING EVERYTHING OUTSIDE.  I COULD JUST LIVE OUT THERE IF WE WEREN’T HERE.  IT WAS HARD ON ME.  ACTUALLY JUST A WINTER AGO WHEN WE WERE SHOVELING THINGS I FELT I AM OLDER, THIS BRINGS IT OUT.  I AM OLDER I CAN TELL.  THIS YEAR, JUST GOING OUT TO GET THE PAPER, SHOVELING MY WAY TO THE MAILBOX, I SAID OH MY GOSH, I AM ANOTHER YEAR OLDER AND I KNOW IT.  IT TOOK ME 72 YEARS TO FIGURE THAT OUT IN MY AGING.  ALL OF OUR LIVES SEEM LIKE THEY GO SWOOSH, FASTER AND FASTER, ACCELERATING.  BETWEEN 70 AND 80 YOU AGE HALF AGAIN AS MUCH.”

WOW!  I thought.  Am I in trouble!

Carolyn’s turn was last but not least.

“WELL, JUST COME BACK WHEN I’M A HUNDRED AND I’LL TELL YOU.  BUT, I WILL SAY THAT I THINK THAT AGING IS A GIFT AND YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO SLOW DOWN AND YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO WEAKEN SO THAT YOU ARE READY TO GO HOME.  BUT IT GIVES YOU TIME TO MEDITATE.  SO IT IS A GIFT.  AGING IS A GIFT.”

I don’t know about you but I found these diverse answers quite interesting.  Some of the surprises I have experienced, some I have not.  Carolyn’s answer was more in alignment with my thoughts.  I have actually stated that I think aging is a gift.  Every year is a gift from God.  Yes, there are things I will face in the future that may be difficult, but I hope that I will be able to accept every day with grace and thanksgiving for all that I can do, and not grieve over those things which I have lost the ability to do.  The greatest gift that aging has given me is the awareness that I really do believe that God gives his children the gift of these “twilight” years so that we can grow in our relationship with Him.  We can take more time to read the scripture and study His word so that we can gain a better understanding of who He is.  I have never before experienced such closeness to God that I have experienced these past seven or eight years.  I receive this time of growing older as a beautiful gift.  Thank you Carolyn for speaking your words.

I do not go into old age unaware that I will slow down.  I learned that lesson from my mother.  She used to tell me that she was so tired and always thought if she just napped she would awaken with more energy and be able to get more accomplished.  It took her awhile to realize that her body didn’t work that way anymore.  I think it was difficult for her at first, but as I watched her, she adapted to go at the pace she could do.  Just like Maryann, she lived to be outside.  She lived to be in her garden. Her garden was her home. She lived to be in her 90’s.  Dementia was her companion the last few years, but I truly believe that her old age was a gift from God.  I do not believe I have ever known anyone else as close to God as my mother was.  Her old age was also a gift to me.

I took that lesson to heart.  Enjoy what I do, do as much as my body will allow and to know when to slow.  From the time I first remember my mother I thought she was old.  She was in her early thirties when I was born and from the time when I was about 5 or 6 I remember her being so old to me.  Well, she lived over six more decades.  The older I became, the younger she became.  I am learning every day.  I learned something from each person who shared their response above.  I say to all of you, thank you for sharing your heart and being open and honest with your responses.  Who knows, perhaps someday I’ll write a book with just a list of all that old age surprises people with along their life’s journey.  We each have just one turn at life.  This is my turn.  I choose to enjoy it while I have it, share my love with others who will receive it, and look forward to my home going to meet my God when that time comes.  Until then, I think I’ll just get to know Him a little better each day.

THE GIFT OF YEARS

By Kathleen Martens

November 25, 2015

“THE GIFT OF YEARS”

Is the title of a book.

Go to the library

And take a look.

Joan Chittister

Is the lady’s name

Who this book

Has called to fame.

Though I’ve not read it,

I will soon.

For it is reserved

At the Library room.

Read all you’re able,

And allow every day

To expand your horizons,

As you go your way.

Life is too short

To not learn all you can.

If I am growing old

I’ll do it like a man!

Well, I would if I was

But I am not,

For I am still a lady

Long ago caught.

So I guess I will age

In a stately grace

As I grow shorter

With a wrinkled face.

Oh the joys

Of looking ahead

At all we can do

Before we are dead.

But when I die

It’s in body alone,

For my eternal spirit,

Will at last be home!

Thank you Maryann for sharing the title of the book “THE GIFT OF YEARS” by Joan Chittister.  I look forward to reading it soon.

It seems as if every day I find that new readers are reading my blog.  If anyone has a topic that they would like me to discuss I am open for suggestions.  Just go to the “Contact” tab and write me an email.  I love hearing the comments from readers even if I am not open to public forum.

Good night to you friends.  May God bless you on your THANKSGIVING DAY.  Make every day a day of THANKSGIVING!

Tuesday November 25 2015  TWO OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS

This week feels as if it is disappearing before I can even experience it.  I actually wrote “Monday” on the top line of this blog before I realized it is already Tuesday night.  I have just one day to prepare for my grandson’s birthday party here on Thursday evening.  I’m hoping the boys will be able to stay overnight afterwards so we can have a slumber party.  When they come for a slumber party I allow them to stay up a little later than usual and watch a DVD movie that I pick out for them.  We put a big quilt on the floor with lots of pillows and they love sleeping there all night.  We do have a spare room that they often sleep in but I think they enjoy the floor better than our sleep number bed.  Besides, they can eat popcorn on the quilt and not in the bedroom.  And I like it when they come over because I get to eat popcorn smothered in coconut oil right along with them, not to mention the fruit smoothies we always make.  I so look forward to actually being a full time grandma when I finish the closure of my business.  I can hardly wait.  Sorry for sounding like a broken record but if you count the times I mention it you can see how important it is to me.

I still have all the wonderful wisdom from my “older friends” that I captured on my IPhone Saturday night.  I haven’t had a chance to investigate the recording as of yet. I just need a window of time in order to sort it all out and transcribe it to the blog.  It is already getting late this evening and I still need to prepare dinner, finish my work downstairs in the computer room, and get to bed on time.  I find that health wise, getting my proper rest is one of the most important things I can do for my body.  Perhaps needing more rest just comes with aging.  Fortunately I sleep hard and deep but my body only sleeps certain hours.  If I am not in bed those hours in the early night I am shortchanged of sleep because I wake up so early and there is no going back to sleep past 5:30 or 6:00 a.m..  I wish I had learned that earlier.  Actually my favorite time to get up would be 4:30 a.m. but I love waking up with Dave so we can have our morning talks before we arise.  He is slowly cycling around to becoming more of a morning person too. 

As of right now I plan to write my blog through the remaining of this year.  I do it mostly for an outlet and reason to write.  But, I find that I do not do as much creative writing in my journal when I budget my day to also write the blog.  After the first of the year I will reassess and see if I will continue to write the blog or sit down in my library and write my heart out by hand.  I just hope my hands will remember how to do so without becoming too tired or painful.  I love holding a pen in my hand and just allowing the words to come.  It is a slower process, I speak more intimately about what is going on in my life and relationships, and I pour out my soul because I think it is a safe place to release my feelings and thoughts.  As long as I am living I don’t suspect anyone else will read my journals and after I am gone I will be leaving a little something of the personal me behind.  And perhaps even after I am gone no one will ever read the volumes I have written.  And I mean volumes, stacks and stacks of journals, thick and big!  But there is one thing I would like to accomplish before I die, and that is to go through my journals and transcribe and edit all the poems that I haven’t yet done.  My poetry seems much deeper and meaningful when it is written on my lap with slow deliberate thinking.  I can definitely tell a big difference in the kind of poetry I write each day in my blog verses what I write in my journals.  When I include poetry in my blog dated before 2015 it was all written by hand, line by line, thought by thought.  Writing poetry is one of my favorite things to do.  I just like to see what will be captured when I start writing.  And I never know when that might be.  I just love to do it.  Even if there was no one else to read it I would write it for God and for the pleasure I receive from creating something that didn’t exist before.

It causes me to ponder when people say to me they do not, or cannot write.  If one is literate, why can one not write?  You simply let your pen bring into focus that which is going on in your heart and mind.  That is the beauty of writing. 

As my husband was proof reading this part of the the blog he made this comment: “One reason I think people don’t write is that they don’t really think they have anything worthwhile to write about”.  Hmm…well, it never stopped me.  Not even tonight.

TWO OF MY CLOSEST FRIENDS

By Kathleen Martens

November 25, 2015

Revealing thoughts on paper

Seems such an easy way,

To capture what comes from within,

Making it easier to say.

Blank pages beg to be filled

With passion, love, and life,

Always accepting what you write

Whether joy or strife.

Paper and pen seem to be

Two of my closest friends.

For what comes out to fill the page,

Is what my heart doth send.

Time has an interesting way

Of distorting the memory of now.

But if I write it while it’s fresh

Clear truth it will allow.

And when my thoughts are captured

I’m a bit lighter inside.

For now I will not forget

All which I did confide.

Good night and God bless you.