Tuesday October 27 2015  TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF

 

Well, I don’t know quite where the above title came from.  It just popped into my head after I typed the date.  So, what does “Take a look at yourself” mean?

Personally, I am a people watcher.  I thoroughly enjoy looking at people’s faces and any other part my eyes may wander to, but especially their faces.  If I am in a public place like an airport or mall I never need to be entertained.  I can sit in a seat and just watch the people for hours.  I often wonder if people really know what the expression on their face looks like, or may reveal to others.  I often ponder that, as I see such somber, serious expressions.  I wonder who are these people, what are they thinking, why are they in this particular place at this time?  Sometimes when I am with Dave waiting for a plane or at another public place where the wait is long, we’ll spy someone across the way, maybe a couple or family.  On occasion we will make up our own fantasy about them as we watch their expressions and antics.  It can be quite interesting.  

Back to the faces.  I think if people really could see the expression on their face they might actually try to change it.  Foreheads furrowed, brows pinched together, eyes squinted, mouth hanging open, tongues hanging out, aloofness, are all some of the picturesque demeanors I have had chance to view.  And I again wonder, do we really know what our face look like when we are not purposely engaged face to face with another person? 

Recently when I was in Branson at the Sight and Sound Theater I had an interesting experience.  It was intermission and hundreds and hundreds of people were all being dismissed at the same time.  Well, one guess where most of us headed.  I was in a quick moving line in the ladies restroom and had an interesting encounter.  Now I want to explain a little something about my primping for the day.  I take my shower, my hair is wet, I brush it once so it will lay down, I get dressed and I am done for the day.  If it is Sunday I’ll put on lipstick if I remember.  Sometimes I remember to brush my hair after its dry, but most days I do not.  This day at Branson was no different.  I’m close to the front of the line so it is moving quickly and I almost had a collision with someone.  Everyone was turning left so I decided to turn right where I saw many empty stalls.  Just as I turned I almost bumped nose to nose with a lady who startled me completely because I didn’t see her there just the second before. She was walking fast and I was walking fast.  You know how many thoughts swirl in your head at any one time, well my first thought was “there was a lady who knew where she was going as the look on her face was very determined”.  Within a split second my mind captures what I was truly seeing just a second before I collided with this “older woman”.  All of a sudden I realized I was going to collide with the mirror image of myself if I did not halt quickly.  That OLDER WOMAN was me!  In that split second of time I had noticed her wrinkles and they didn’t bother me at all UNTIL I realized, hey, that was me.  Those were my wrinkles!  At first I actually did not recognize myself until I was nose to nose walking into a mirror.  For once, I truly did see the expression on my face before realizing I was going to be viewing myself.  I find I can make myself look a lot better in a mirror if I hold my smile in place so as not to have too many drooping lines show.  I caught myself off guard.  I guess I better start taking a better notice of the expression on my face that I am exhibiting to the world.  What do you look like to others?

I must admit it was a quick, interesting meeting with myself.  I guess I just don’t realize how I really look.  Maybe that’s a good thing.

Sometimes I just put myself in situations so that I can people watch.  The Olbrich Botanical Gardens in Madison are a great place to do it.  People are usually in a good frame of mind when strolling through a peaceful garden and their eyes are full of wonder and curiosity.  I think the environment of the garden and other people close by give them a comfort level to smile back.  I usually get lots of smiles and lots of conversation when I go there to browse.

Sometimes I stand at the exit of a planeload of people who are debarking, with a big smile on my face, and try to catch everyone’s eye as they pass me.  I’ve actually done counts of how many will smile.  Just for your information, when I smile at a person their first reaction is a startled look, then the eyebrows furrow and most look away as quickly as they can.  There are always the two or three who will smile back and in their eyes I see a kindred spirit.  I will tell you who does smile, all the children.  They light up when we make eye contact and a big grin will become plastered on their face.  Many of them will watch me as they are being dragged away by their parents.  Sometimes when I am in Woodman’s Grocery Store in Madison I will smile at anyone who looks at me, and you would be surprised at the responses I receive.  Some do quick head turns to avoid any further contact, some look quizzical or look around to see if they are close to someone else whom I may be smiling at, and some will actually speak to me and smile back.  I’ll tell you who does smile back to me in Woodman’s, all the little old ladies, bent and shriveled, walking up and down the aisle with just a few things in their cart.  As a general rule, our world does not know how to smile at strangers anymore.  Strangers do not know how to spontaneously smile back.  Again, ask yourself the question, what does my expression say to another?

I don’t know about you but I want to look like I am full of life and joy and the love of God.  Others may not recognize the God-part, but I have often had people who don’t know me say there is something special they see in my eyes when I smile at them.  I truly hope it is the love of God being poured over them.  How much better would the world be if we could again trust enough to return a smile, or even better yet, to give the first one. 

Below is a short poem I wrote several years ago inspired by a friend’s smile.

 

Inspired by Jeanette’s Smile

February 26, 2011

 

A smile is always a special thing,

To someone else, joy it brings.

And because you give it away,

Another on your face

Can take its place.

 

Well, now I guess I know what “TAKE A LOOK AT YOURSELF” means, especially today.

 

Update:  Dave is still having intermittent pain.  I am busy constantly but not accomplishing what I must.  I tell myself tomorrow will be different because I am not even going to go out or get dressed.  I must work in my studio office ALL DAY and go through all my equipment and supplies for Friday’s all day photo session.  I won’t be answering the phone, but hopefully I’ll surface in the evening so I can find out what else is in my head to write about.  Maybe I won’t even take a shower or brush my hair.  I have those days too!  They are the ones I cherish!  (But I do brush my teeth)!

 

 

IT MAY MEAN A LOT

By Kathleen Martens

October 27 2015

 

 

What would it be like

If a smile didn’t exist?

And we’d never seen one,

So it wasn’t even missed?

 

How would we know

If one was happy or sad?

Would we be able to decipher

If they were joyful or mad?

 

So much our expressions

Speak louder than words.

The attitude that precedes

Must somehow be heard.

 

How we set our face

Is how it will grow.

What is in your heart

Your face will show.

 

Be careful the brows

That furrow down,

Sometimes that’s construed

As part of a frown.

 

Watch when you squint

At what others say,

Could it be mistrust

That you display?

 

Be careful your expression,

Know what you present.

It could trigger

An unlikely event.

 

So when you get up

And are ready for the day

Grab a few smiles

Before you go on your way.

 

And use them generously

When you see others pass,

Your smile may be fleeting,

But to another may last.

 

Take an abundant supply

Because there is no cost.

There is always another

If the first one gets lost.

 

The more you give,

The more will appear.

And they are always so nice

For those who are near

 

So purposely give one

Whether you want to or not

Because to another

It may mean a lot.

 

I hope you will stop and think of this poem or post it on your mirror as a reminder to smile.  I truly believe a smile is a gift that God created for us to give away.

 

Good night.  May you have sweet dreams full of smiles.