Monday September 28, 2015  BECOMING MORE AWARE

I actually have some thoughts already in my mind as I type this first line of my blog.

And the above first line is the only line I was able to write before I was called away due to a duty that had to be done when the timer went off at about 5:30 p.m..  It is now 7:50 p.m. and I have just this moment returned.  

I have been painting a pedestal and table throughout the afternoon.  It was planned to be done this morning but my husband’s friend called yesterday and informed him that his mother had just died.  She was 90 years old and in a care facility.  This friend has not missed a day attending to his mother in the care facility for the full seven plus years that she was there.  Dave is a very close friend to this person and was asked by his friend to come to the viewing today before she was cremated.  I think he needed Dave there for spiritual and emotional support.  I was asked to come as well.  That is why our plans did not go quite as planned this day.  So I am behind in what I planned, but in the scheme of life it is not a big deal.  Going with Dave and helping support his friend in his grief was much more important.

Overall, this has been quite an interesting day for me.  I shall back track a bit here and refer to my trip again.  Before I went on my trip my life was quite regimented.  Up to my departure I was usually up and out of bed between 4:30 and 5:00 a.m..  Then I spent time in my Library meeting with God, praying, worshiping, and meditating in His presence.  Then time for exercise, lunch, work (photography), housecleaning, and whatever else needed to be done, and back in bed by 9:00 p.m..  Dave was not yet retired so my days were a bit less busy, in that I wasn’t cooking lunch and preparing breakfast for him, or using up time talking and going places together, not to mention lying in bed each morning for an hour or more after awakening to listen to sermons together, or just talk, etc…  (I’ll leave the “etc…” to your own imagination.   

Needless to say, my routine was derailed from my then normal routine and we have settled into a bit of a new normal for us since Dave and I are both retired now.  There has been one great thing that I have missed tremendously however, and that is the time I always spent in the Lord’s presence in the quiet and tranquility of early dawn, sometimes for two or three hours a day.  I have been listening to sermons each day at the gym while I exercise, I still love the Lord and try my best to be obedient unto His scripture, but I was beginning to feel a “lack” in my life.  It has been gnawing at me because I knew what was missing.  It was my intimate time in His presence daily in the secret quiet place of my heart.  Lately I have been burdened by this and I knew it was the presence of the Holy Spirit in my life calling me back to this important time of intimacy with God.

Lately it has been hit and miss.  Sometimes I could get up early enough to have my quiet time, but most times it was not possible due to how busy I have become with “life”.  I can see why people go through fast food lanes.  But that is something I choose not to do.  Since I’ve been home, Dave and I have eaten out two times and one was Friday night when we took Lana and Tim to dinner.  I can also see why people hire house cleaners.  That is something I wouldn’t mind doing.  But, I found spiritually that “hit and miss” was not doing it for me. 

I want to share my conversation with the Lord this morning.  Remember, I do not hear God speak in a booming voice, rather I hear Him speak in a quiet thought that comes into my head as I write furiously to capture it.  God is very patient with me.  He puts the thoughts in my head in spurts and I write them down, then He continues.  It’s as if there is a fluidity of thoughts that just comes to me.  I pause occasionally to respond, or ask questions, and then the flow begins again.  Well, this morning is an example of such a conversation.  But the reason I am sharing this with you is because of what happened the rest of the day in regards to what I wrote this morning.  After my morning time with the Lord I went to the gym to work out.  I listened to a session from a series I’ve been listening to regarding INTIMACY WITH GOD.  I was so amazed as I heard the speaker use some of the very phrases that I received from the Lord this morning.  Over and over again there was a repetitiveness from the speaker of what the Lord had impressed into my heart this very day. 

Now, let’s fast forward to this afternoon when we arrived home from the funeral.  Dave brought the mail in and there was a letter in the mail from a Minister, Dr. Charles Stanley, that I receive each month.  I enjoy reading his letters because they are always so right on with the scripture and very uplifting to read.  I opened and read it, and there again were the same phrases and connotations that the Holy Spirit and delivered to me this morning.  It was as if God himself was emphasizing the importance of what He trying to get across to me.  So…I will once more create a “new normal” for my retirement days.  I believe that I must return to the practice of meeting with God each and every morning.  My time with the Lord is my most favorite time of the day and it is something I must reclaim.  Here is my conversation with the Lord in regards to the matter discussed above.

“Lord, how do I best use my time, though so short, with You?”

HEART SOUNDS:  “Come into My gates with thanksgiving in your heart and enter My courts with praise.  I await to hear your voice lifted high, rejoicing My name.  Open your heart that I may restore your soul and that you will again come boldly to my throne of grace.  I never stop calling your name.  Come close and take my hand.  It is only through perseverance that you come daily into our intimate secret place to seek My face.  I long for you to come.”

“Lord, refresh the fullness of Your Spirit within me.  I desire more of You.  Restore to me a double portion, so that I may be used to minister unto others.”

HEART SOUNDS:  “Ask more of Me.  I desire to bless My children.  I am your strength and refuge.  I am your help in time of trouble.  When your spirit is troubled, ask for restoration and I will flood you with My living water which will pour through you to overflowing.  Our relationship is a daily, ongoing intimacy.  You cannot live on yesterday’s abundance.  Your abundance is for this day.  Ask and you will receive. 

Rejoice in this day for yesterday’s blessings were for yesterday.  I want you to understand that I desire to give you good gifts daily.  Joy comes in the morning and fills you throughout the day.  You must wait until tomorrow for the joy that will come with tomorrow.  It is DAILY THAT I RESTORE YOUR STRENGTH AND FILL YOU WITH JOY, PEACE, AND LOVE.  Ask, and you will receive enough that you will be filled to overflowing, so you will have plenty to share.  When I overflow through you, My presence touches each person you come in contact with.  Also, continually ask for the infilling of renewed strength and power.  It is Mine to give.  I watch and listen for My children to desire more.  DAILY IS THE KEY.

Open your day with the awareness of My presence, and then you will be more sensitive to My presence as well as hearing the words I speak to you, throughout your day.  My Holy Spirit lives within you, and beckons and woos you to come daily.  Do not grieve My Spirit, rather turn and run toward me.  I wrap you in My loving embrace.”

“Lord, thank You.  I know I am too busy.  Please give me direction as to what to cut out of my day.

I love You Lord.”

I wrote the following poem immediately following the above dialogue.

SEEK FIRST GOD’S KINGDOM

By Kathleen Martens

September 28, 2015

Every day has twenty four hours

For all that must be done.

I really do think God intended

We work our hardest, yet have some fun!

Our morning time is our first fruits,

Best designed to walk in God’s presence,

And when we purposely follow this course

Our day will be lived in His essence.

Seek first the kingdom of God

And He will add all else we need.

But we must first dwell in His presence

And on His Holy Scriptures feed.

Worship first in dawn’s early light

That you are planted firmly upon His road.

Daily God will renew our strength

And He willingly helps lighten our load.

Matthew 6:33:  “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you.”

I give my thanks to those of you who have read these words, as you are allowing me to share my personal handwritten journal with you.  I don’t do it very often, but I thought today was quite special because I have felt the Lord calling me back to my quiet time with Him.  Then to have it confirmed three times in one day seems awesome.  He has certainly made me more aware that He is calling me to return to our morning time together.  I hope you too set aside time daily to become better acquainted with God.  Remember, we serve an AWESOME GOD!

Now back to a capsule of today.  This afternoon I was able to spray several light coats of paint on my table and its base .  I have one more coat to apply but will not be able to do so until 6:00 p.m. tomorrow evening due to the instructions on the paint can.  Hopefully, that will be my final coat, otherwise I will need to buy one more can of paint.  I look forward to seeing it in the light tomorrow.  I have it in the garage and it was getting dark before I finished today’s final coat.

The picture of Calendar Wisdom is set next to the table’s pedestal. 

I would love to write more but it is now bedtime, so good night and God bless you.